Black humor; City and town life -- Fiction; Intellectuals -- Fiction; London (England) -- Fiction; Satire
Out in the gallery, among the boats, the views of the Grand Canal, and
the Firth of Forth, Gumbril placidly ruminated. Poor old Lypiatt, he was
thinking. Dear old Lypiatt, even, in spite of his fantastic egotism.
Such a bad painter, such a bombinating poet, such a loud emotional
improviser on the piano! And going on like this, year after year,
pegging away at the same old things—always badly! And always without a
penny, always living in the most hideous squalor! Magnificent and
pathetic old Lypiatt!
A door suddenly opened and a loud, unsteady voice, now deep and harsh,
now breaking to shrillness, exploded into the gallery.
“... like a Veronese,” it was saying; “enormous, vehement, a great
swirling composition” (‘swirling composition’—mentally, the young
assistant made a note of that), “but much more serious, of course, much
more spiritually significant, much more——”
“Lypiatt!” Gumbril had risen from his chair, had turned, had advanced,
holding out his hand.
“Why, it’s Gumbril. Good Lord!” and Lypiatt seized the proffered hand
with an excruciating cordiality. He seemed to be in exuberantly good
spirits. “We’re settling about my show, Mr. Albemarle and I,” he
explained. “You know Gumbril, Mr. Albemarle?”
“Pleased to meet you,” said Mr. Albemarle. “Our friend, Mr. Lypiatt,” he
added richly, “has the true artistic temp——”
“It’s going to be magnificent.” Lypiatt could not wait till Mr.
Albemarle had finished speaking. He gave Gumbril a heroic blow on the
shoulder.
“... artistic temperament, as I was saying,” pursued Mr. Albemarle. “He
is altogether too impatient and enthusiastic for us poor people ...” a
ducal smile of condescension accompanied this graceful act of
self-abasement ... “who move in the prosaic, practical, workaday world.”
Lypiatt laughed, a loud, discordant peal. He didn’t seem to mind being
accused of having an artistic temperament; he seemed, indeed, to enjoy
it, if anything. “Fire and water,” he said aphoristically, “brought
together, beget steam. Mr. Albemarle and I go driving along like a steam
engine. Psh, psh!” He worked his arms like a pair of alternate pistons.
He laughed; but Mr. Albemarle only coldly and courteously smiled. “I was
just telling Mr. Albemarle about the great Crucifixion I’ve just been
doing. It’s as big and headlong as a Veronese, but much more serious,
more....”
Behind them the little assistant was expounding to a new visitor the
beauties of the etchings. “Very intense,” he was saying, “the feeling in
this passage.” The shadow, indeed, clung with an insistent affection
round the stern of the boat. “And what a fine, what a——” he hesitated
for an instant, and under his pale, oiled hair his face became suddenly
very red—“what a swirling composition.” He looked anxiously at the
visitor. The remark had been received without comment. He felt immensely
relieved.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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