"I worked for your uncle for a dollar and a half a week, bein' as we'd
knowed each other so long, and on account of 'im bein' easy to get along
with and never makin' no trouble, but I wouldn't work for no woman for
less 'n two dollars."
"That is satisfactory to me," returned Dorothy, trying to be dignified. "I
daresay we shall get on all right. Can you stay now?"
"If you've finished," said Mrs. Smithers, ignoring the question, "there's
a few things I'd like to ask. 'Ow did you get that bruise on your face?"
"I--I ran into something," answered Dorothy, unwillingly, and taken quite
by surprise.
"Wot was it," demanded Mrs. Smithers. "Your 'usband's fist?"
"No," replied Mrs. Carr, sternly, "it was a piece of furniture."
"I've never knowed furniture," observed Mrs. Smithers, doubtfully, "to get
up and 'it people in the face wot wasn't doin' nothink to it. If you
disturb a rockin'-chair at night w'en it's restin' quiet, you'll get your
ankle 'it, but I've never knowed no furniture to 'it people under the eye
unless it 'ad been threw, that's wot I ain't.
"I mind me of my youngest sister," Mrs. Smithers went on, her keen eyes
uncomfortably fixed upon Dorothy. "'Er 'usband was one of these 'ere
masterful men, 'e was, same as wot yours is, and w'en 'er didn't please
'im, 'e 'd 'it 'er somethink orful. Many's the time I've gone there and
found 'er with 'er poor face all cut up and the crockery broke bad. 'I
dropped a cup' 'er'd say to me, 'and the pieces flew up and 'it me in the
face.' 'Er face looked like a crazy quilt from 'aving dropped so many
cups, and wunst, without thinkin' wot I might be doin' of, I gave 'er a
chiny tea set for 'er Christmas present.
"Wen I went to see 'er again, the tea set was all broke and 'er 'ad court
plaster all over 'er face. The pieces must 'ave flew more 'n common from
the tea set, cause 'er 'usband's 'ed was laid open somethink frightful and
they'd 'ad in the doctor to take a seam in it. From that time on I never
'eard of no more cups bein' dropped and 'er face looked quite human and
peaceful like w'en 'e died. God rest 'is soul, 'e ain't a-breakin' no tea
sets now by accident nor a-purpose neither. I was never one to interfere
between man and wife, Miss Carr, but I want you to tell your 'usband that
should 'e undertake to 'it me, 'e'll get a bucket of 'ot tea throwed in
'is face."
"It's not at all likely," answered Dorothy, biting her lip, "that such a
thing will happen." She was swayed by two contradictory impulses--one to
scream with laughter, the other to throw something at Mrs. Smithers.
"'E's been at peace now six months come Tuesday," continued Mrs. Smithers,
"and on account of 'is 'avin' broke the tea set, I don't feel no call to
wear mourning for 'im more 'n a year, though folks thinks as 'ow it brands
me as 'eartless for takin' it off inside of two. Sakes alive, wot's that?"
she cried, drawing her sable skirts more closely about her as a dark
shadow darted across the kitchen.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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