THE CLERK. What I say. There ain't anybody else. AUGUSTUS. Tush! Where are the others? THE CLERK. At the front. AUGUSTUS. Quite right. Most proper. Why aren't you at the front? THE CLERK. Over age. Fifty-seven. AUGUSTUS. But you can still do your bit. Many an older man is in the G.R.'s, or volunteering for home defence. THE CLERK. I have volunteered. AUGUSTUS. Then why are you not in uniform? THE CLERK. They said they wouldn't have me if I was given away with a pound of tea. Told me to go home and not be an old silly. [A sense of unbearable wrong, till now only smouldering in him, bursts into flame.] Young Bill Knight, that I took with me, got two and sevenpence. I got nothing. Is it justice? This country is going to the dogs, if you ask me. AUGUSTUS [rising indignantly]. I do not ask you, sir; and I will not allow you to say such things in my presence. Our statesmen are the greatest known to history. Our generals are invincible. Our army is the admiration of the world. [Furiously.] How dare you tell me that the country is going to the dogs! THE CLERK. Why did they give young Bill Knight two and sevenpence, and not give me even my tram fare? Do you call that being great statesmen? As good as robbing me, I call it. AUGUSTUS. That's enough. Leave the room. [He sits down and takes up his pen, settling himself to work. The clerk shuffles to the door. Augustus adds, with cold politeness] Send me the Secretary. THE CLERK. I'M the Secretary. I can't leave the room and send myself to you at the same time, can I? AUGUSTUS, Don't be insolent. Where is the gentleman I have been corresponding with: Mr Horatio Floyd Beamish? THE CLERK [returning and bowing]. Here. Me. AUGUSTUS. You! Ridiculous. What right have you to call yourself by a pretentious name of that sort? THE CLERK. You may drop the Horatio Floyd. Beamish is good enough for me. AUGUSTUS. Is there nobody else to take my instructions? THE CLERK. It's me or nobody. And for two pins I'd chuck it. Don't you drive me too far. Old uns like me is up in the world now. AUGUSTUS. If we were not at war, I should discharge you on the spot for disrespectful behavior. But England is in danger; and I cannot think of my personal dignity at such a moment. [Shouting at him.] Don't you think of yours, either, worm that you are; or I'll have you arrested under the Defence of the Realm Act, double quick. THE CLERK. What do I care about the realm? They done me out of two and seven-- AUGUSTUS. Oh, damn your two and seven! Did you receive my letters? THE CLERK. Yes. AUGUSTUS. I addressed a meeting here last night--went straight to the platform from the train. I wrote to you that I should expect you to be present and report yourself. Why did you not do so? THE CLERK. The police wouldn't let me on the platform. AUGUSTUS. Did you tell them who you were? THE CLERK. They knew who I was. That's why they wouldn't let me up.