Scotland -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
However ill an ordinary member of the
congregation might become in the kirk he sat on till the service ended,
but Hendry would wander to the door and shut it if he noticed that the
wind was playing irreverent tricks with the pages of Bibles, and proof
could still be brought forward that he would stop deliberately in the
aisle to lift up a piece of paper, say, that had floated there. After
the first psalm had been sung it was Hendry's part to lift up the plate
and carry its tinkling contents to the session-house. On the greatest
occasions he remained so calm, so indifferent, so expressionless, that
he might have been present the night before at a rehearsal.
When there was preaching at night the church was lit by tallow candles,
which also gave out all the artificial heat provided. Two candles stood
on each side of the pulpit, and others were scattered over the church,
some of them fixed into holes on rough brackets, and some merely
sticking in their own grease on the pews. Hendry superintended the
lighting of the candles, and frequently hobbled through the church to
snuff them. Mr. Dishart was a man who could do anything except snuff a
candle, but when he stopped in his sermon to do that he as often as not
knocked the candle over. In vain he sought to refix it in its proper
place, and then all eyes turned to Hendry. As coolly as though he were
in a public hall or place of entertainment, the kirk-officer arose and,
mounting the stair, took the candle from the minister's reluctant hands
and put it right. Then he returned to his seat, not apparently puffed
up, yet perhaps satisfied with himself; while Mr. Dishart, glaring after
him to see if he was carrying his head high, resumed his wordy way.
Never was there a man more uncomfortably loved than Mr. Dishart. Easie
Haggart, his maid-servant, reproved him at the breakfast table. Lang
Tammas and Sam'l Mealmaker crouched for five successive Sabbath nights
on his manse-wall to catch him smoking (and got him). Old wives grumbled
by their hearths when he did not look in to despair of their salvation.
He told the maidens of his congregation not to make an idol of him. His
session saw him (from behind a haystack) in conversation with a strange
woman, and asked grimly if he remembered that he had a wife. Twenty
were his years when he came to Thrums, and on the very first Sabbath he
knocked a board out of the pulpit. Before beginning his trial sermon he
handed down the big Bible to the precentor, to give his arms free swing.
The congregation, trembling with exhilaration, probed his meaning. Not
a square inch of paper, they saw, could be concealed there. Mr. Dishart
had scarcely any hope for the Auld Lichts; he had none for any other
denomination. Davit Lunan got behind his handkerchief to think for
a moment, and the minister was on him like a tiger. The call was
unanimous. Davit proposed him.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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