German fiction -- Translations into English; Holy Roman Empire -- History -- Charles V, 1519-1556 -- Fiction
Meanwhile, with a feeling of defiant self-confidence, she was again
braiding her hair. But the mental firmness which she had regained did
not last; more than once her hand faltered while the comb was dividing
the wealth of her golden tresses. How ardently Charles had praised their
luxuriant beauty!-and to-day he was to rejoice in it again. But why had
not even one poor word from his own hand accompanied the summons?
Why had his messenger been only a valet? Why had he wounded her so
deeply the night before?
Why did leaden weights seem to hang upon her soul when she attempted to
soar upward?
Oh, what a state of things!
Who had given the regent, to whom nothing attracted her, the right to
dispose of her as though she were a chattel or her captive?
Had she, with her heart and her honour, also resigned her freedom to her
lover?
If she had only possessed one, one single person to whom she could utter
her thoughts!
Then her glance fell upon the knapsack, and she remembered Wolf. He was
to set out on his journey early the next morning; her lover expected her
after vespers; so perhaps she would not be permitted to see him again,
for she scarcely dared to hope that, after the rebuff which he had
experienced, he would seek her again. Yet she longed once more to clasp
the hand of the man for whom she felt a sister's affection and yet had so
deeply wounded.
Without one kind farewell word from him, the bitterest drop of all would
fall into the wormwood which already mingled in her happiness. It seemed
incomprehensible that he who from childhood had given her his whole heart
would henceforth deny her every friendly feeling. For her own sake, and
also for his, this should not be.
How many had sought her love! But perhaps the time would soon come when,
on account of the one who must supply the place of all others, no one
would care for her. Then she wished at least to be sure of the sympathy,
the friendship of this good loyal man.
There were still many things for her to do, but to seek Wolf she left
them all, even the visit to Frau Lerch, whom she wished to ask to devote
herself exclusively to her service in Prebrunn.
Full of anxious cares, lofty anticipations, and the ardent desire to
conciliate Wolf, she took the by no means lengthy walk to the Hiltners.
Not until she reached the doctor's house did it occur to her that she had
forgotten to execute her father's commission and relieve Ursel's anxiety
about her darling.
How did it happen that, if any affair of her own interested her, she
always forgot what she owed to others?
Barbara was obliged to wait in the broad, lofty hall of the syndic's
house for the maid-servant, who announced her; and the stout man with the
big head, who had seized the knocker just before she entered, shared her
fate.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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