Up to now I cannot look forward to an end of my terrible illness;
on the contrary, my sufferings, and with it, my cares, have still
increased. On the 29th of February I underwent my fourth operation,
and it may be, perhaps, my fate to undergo a fifth or even more. If
this continues, my illness will surely last till the middle of summer,
and what will then become of me? How shall I then manage to live till
I have recovered strength enough to gain my own living by my pen? In
short, I will not trouble you further with my complaints, and refer
only to my letter of the 22nd of February, asking you to use all your
influence to induce the Philharmonic Society to carry out their former
resolution concerning the concert for my benefit.
XI.
To I. MOSCHELES in London.
_Vienna, March_ 14, 1827.
My dear Moscheles.
Some days ago I found out through Herr Lewinger that you inquired
in a letter to him of the 10th of February regarding the state of my
illness, of which so many different rumours have been spread about.
Although I have no doubts whatever that my letter of the 24th of
February has arrived, which will explain everything you desire to know,
I can but thank you for your sympathy with my sad lot, and beseech you
to be solicitous about the request which you know of from my first
letter, and I am quite convinced that, in union with Sir Smart and
other of my friends, you will succeed in bringing about a favourable
result for me at the Philharmonic Society. I have once more written to
Sir Smart about it.
On the 27th of February I underwent the fourth operation, and there are
visible symptoms that I shall have to suffer a fifth. What does it tend
to, and what will become of me if it continues for some time longer? A
hard lot, indeed, has fallen upon me! However, I submit to the will of
fate, and only pray to God so to ordain it in His divine will, that I
may be protected from want as long as I have to endure death in life.
This will give me strength to bear my lot, however terrible it may be,
with humble submission to the will of the Most High.
Therefore, my dear Moscheles, I entrust once more my affair to you, and
remain with greatest respect ever
Your friend,
L. VAN BEETHOVEN.
Hummel is here and has called on me several times.
XII.
To I. MOSCHELES in London.
_Vienna, March_ 18, 1827.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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