Bill Nye and Boomerang: Or, The Tale of a Meek-Eyed Mule, and Some Other Literary GemsNye, Bill
General
Bill Nye and Boomerang: Or, The Tale of a Meek-Eyed Mule, and Some Other Literary Gems
Nye, Bill
American wit and humor
The wonderful performing steer, Zazel, is the only one-horned, one-eared
and bob-tailed steer ever born in captivity; This steer is found alone
with Bill Nye's Great Cast-Iron Hippodrome and 27-Karat Utopian
Giganticum.
THE PRESS CORDIALLY INVITED.
I extend to the members of the press everywhere a most hearty
invitation. They will be furnished with luxuriant reclining chairs,
porcelain cuspidores, and gold toothpicks to pick out the fragments of
lemonade from their pearly teeth.
A special clown will be devoted to the members of the press.
A guide will have charge of visiting journalists to show them the
curiosities, and see that they do not forget and carry anything away.
Members of the press will be allowed to sit on the top seats and let
their feet hang down.
Do not fool with the animals.
PRESS COMMENTS.
The Owltown _Bunghole_ says: "No living man has ever heretofore dared
to perform all he advertised. Bill Nye certainly has secured the most
wonderful and costly galaxy of arenic talent, and the most perfect
and oriental conglomeration of grand, gloomy and peculiar zoological
specimens from the four corners of the globe. The editor and his
nineteen children, with his wife and hired girl, were passed in
yesterday by the handsome and gentlemanly, modest and lady-like
proprietor of Bill Nye's ownest own and simultaneous world-renowned
hippodrome and menagerie."
A CARD.
A report has been set in circulation, probably by some unprincipled
rival showmen, to the effect that I will not exhibit with my entire show
at Granite Canon, but that the main show will be divided, the famous
Trakene Stallion, Boomerang, going to Greeley; the Royal Mexican Plug
Billy English, going to Whiskey Flat; the Mammoth Reptilian Angleworm
going to Last Chance; the famous Trick Mule, Winfield Scott Hancock,
going to Tie City, while the balance of the show would appear at Granite
Canon.
I pronounce this and all similar reports the most flagrant, lying
canards, as I shall not only appear at Granite Canon with my entire
aggregation of my own and only jam-up-and-scrumptuous show and North
American Boss and Supreme Oriental and Collossal Menagerie, but at all
points where I have advertised to appear. I make no show, but I can buy
and sell every show on the road before breakfast, and don't you forget
it.
[Illustration: 0033]
I travel on my own special train, and regular passenger and express
trains are held while I have the right of way with my elegant
drawing-room and palace cars for the animals, and colossal silver
chariots for the men.
I exhibit also under my acres and acres of canvas, and two-bits will
admit you to all parts of the show.
Special trains will run to and from Granite Canon on the day of the show
at regular rates.
Simultaneously yours,
Bill Nye.
LETTER FROM PARIS.
Paris, May 30th, 1878.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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