Boswelliana: The Commonplace Book of James Boswell, with a Memoir and AnnotationsBoswell, James
History
Boswelliana: The Commonplace Book of James Boswell, with a Memoir and Annotations
Boswell, James
Boswell, James, 1740-1795
The first part of Boswell’s letter embracing these incongruous details
is dated “1st February,” and occupies seven folio pages. With temporary
discretion the writer hesitated to send off so strange a communication;
at length, on the 28th of the month, he resumed his narrative, which
after another interval was concluded on the 4th March, and thereupon
despatched. Respecting his unhappy amour he writes:—
“I have talked a great deal of my sweet little mistress; I am,
however, uneasy about her. Furnishing a house and maintaining her
with a maid will cost me a great deal of money, and it is too like
marriage, or too much a settled plan of licentiousness; but what
can I do? I have already taken the house, and the lady has agreed
to go in at Whitsuntide; I cannot in honour draw back.... Now am I
tormented because my charmer has formerly loved others. Besides, she
is ill-bred, quite a rompish girl. She debases my dignity; she has no
refinement, but she is very handsome and very lively. What is it to
me that she has formerly loved? so have I. I am positive that since
I first courted her at Moffat she has been constant to me; she is
kind, she is generous. What shall I do? I wish I could get off; and
yet how awkward would it be!... What is to be thought of this life,
my friend? Hear the story of my last three days. After tormenting
myself with reflecting on my charmer’s former loves, and ruminating
on parting with her, I went to her. I could not conceal my being
distressed. I told her I was very unhappy, but I would not tell her
why. She took this very seriously, and was so much affected that she
went next morning and gave up her house. I went in the afternoon and
secured the house, and then drank tea with her. She was much agitated;
she said she was determined to go and board herself in the north of
England, and that I used her very ill. I expostulated with her; I was
sometimes inclined to let her go, and sometimes my heart was like to
burst within me. I held her dear hand; her eyes were full of passion;
I told her what made me miserable; she was pleased to find it was
nothing worse. She had imagined I was suspicious of her fidelity, and
she thought that very ungenerous in reconsidering her behaviour. She
said I should not mind her faults before I knew her, since her conduct
was now more circumspect. She owned that she loved me more than she
had ever done her husband. All was well again.”
Boswell went out, and the same evening got drunk, and committed gross
follies. On the 30th March he wrote to Mr. Temple from Auchinleck. He
informed him that as his Circe had gone to Moffat, he has “had time
to think coolly,” and to call up “that reason which he had so often
contradicted.” He proceeds:—
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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