Bottoms Up: An Application of the Slapstick to SatireNathan, George Jean
General
Bottoms Up: An Application of the Slapstick to Satire
Nathan, George Jean
American wit and humor
(_in tears, again cutting in_)
A?
EBBSMITH
(_with a laugh_)
J!
CHARTERIS
(_in great surprise_)
J?
EBBSMITH
(_repeating, nodding his head_)
J!!
CHARTERIS
(_in wonder_)
Y?
MRS. E.
(_ditto_)
Y?
EBBSMITH
(_with a grim smile, displaying a bundle of letters_)
C!
(_Mrs. E. and Charteris look at each other in alarm, realising now
what Ebbsmith’s ironic twitting means_)
MRS. E.
O!
CHARTERIS
H----!
EBBSMITH
(_waving the letters tauntingly under his wife’s eyes_)
C!
(_Mrs. E. endeavours to speak. She tries to summon courage to ask
Ebbsmith how and where he got the carelessly-guarded, incriminating
letters, but her lips are muffled through fear. Ebbsmith waits
patiently, sneeringly. Then, seeing his wife’s hopeless struggle to
phrase the question----_)
EBBSMITH
(_quietly taking a five dollar bill from his wallet, and holding it
aloft, with a significant smile_)
A----.
CHARTERIS
(_puzzled_)
A?
EBBSMITH
(_nodding toward entrance at R. 2_)
V.
MRS. E.
(_beginning to comprehend_)
O!
(_she rushes to bell. She presses it in order to summon the bribed
Jenkins and lodge her accusations against him for his deceit. There
is a pause. Enter Jenkins. Mrs. Ebbsmith makes to speak. Ebbsmith
interrupts her._)
EBBSMITH
(_to Jenkins, quietly_)
T.
(_Jenkins nods and exits. There is another pause. Charteris attempts
to conceal his nervousness by puffing nonchalantly at a cigarette.
Jenkins enters with the tea. Ebbsmith motions his wife and Charteris
to take their seats at the small table. Puzzled, they obey. Jenkins
pours and exits._)
EBBSMITH
(_taking from his pocket two railroad tickets, one of which he hands
Charteris_)
U.
CHARTERIS
(_perplexed_)
I?
EBBSMITH
(_nodding firmly_)
U!
(_Ebbsmith now hands the other ticket to his wife_)
EBBSMITH
(_as he gives it into her puzzled hands; in same tone as before_)
U!
MRS. E.
(_in a tone of nervous bewilderment_)
I?
EBBSMITH
(_nodding firmly_)
U!
(_Mrs. E. and Charteris look at each other. Their expressions suggest
anything but a feeling of personal comfort. They look at each other’s
tickets_)
MRS. E.
(_reading name of road on top of ticket_)
“B----.”
(_her eyes, still dimmed by tears, prevent her from seeing the rest.
She starts to mumble the “and” which follows the_ “_B_”)
“n----.”
(_but gets no further, and breaks down crying_)
CHARTERIS
(_finishing the name of the road_)
“O.”
(_Charteris and Ebbsmith look at each other fixedly across the
tea-table_)
CHARTERIS
(_deliberately_)
U----.
(_Ebbsmith lifts his eyebrows_)
CHARTERIS
(_hotly_)
B----.
(_Ebbsmith lifts his eyebrows_)
CHARTERIS
(_choking back the “damned,” and, flinging down his hand in disgust at
the whole business_)
’L!
EBBSMITH
(_rising, going to door and holding aside the portières,
significantly_)
P!
MRS. E.
(_sobbing out her reawakened old love for Zachery_)
“Z”!
EBBSMITH
(_insisting; in even tone_)
D!
MRS. E.
(_sobbing wildly_)
“Z”!!
EBBSMITH
(_with absolute finality_)
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account