BREAKFAST (_continued_) Bonnie Scotland--Parritch an' cream--Fin'an haddies--A knife on the ocean wave--_À la Français_--In the gorgeous East--_Chota hazri_--English as she is spoke--Dâk bungalow fare--Some quaint dishes--Breakfast with "my tutor"--A Don's absence of mind 22-33 CHAPTER IV LUNCHEON Why lunch?--Sir Henry Thompson on overdoing it--The children's dinner--City lunches--"Ye Olde Cheshyre Cheese"--Doctor Johnson--Ye pudding--A great fall in food--A snipe pudding--Skirt, not rump steak--Lancashire hot-pot--A Cape "brady" 34-43 CHAPTER V LUNCHEON (_continued_) Shooting luncheons--Cold tea and a crust--Clear turtle--Such larks!--Jugged duck and oysters--Woodcock pie--Hunting luncheons--Pie crusts--The true Yorkshire pie--Race-course luncheons--Suggestions to caterers--The "Jolly Sandboys" stew--Various recipes--A race-course sandwich--Angels' pie--"Suffolk pride"--Devilled larks--A light lunch in the Himalayas 44-58 CHAPTER VI DINNER Origin--Early dinners--The noble Romans--"Vitellius the Glutton"--Origin of haggis--The Saxons--Highland hospitality--The French invasion--Waterloo avenged--The bad fairy "_Ala_"--Comparisons--The English cook or the foreign food torturer?--Plain or flowery--Fresh fish and the flavour wrapped up--George Augustus Sala--Doctor Johnson again 59-72 CHAPTER VII DINNER (_continued_) Imitation--Dear Lady Thistlebrain--Try it on the dog--Criminality of the English caterer--The stove, the stink, the steamer--Roasting v. baking--False economy--Dirty ovens--Frills and fingers--Time over dinner--A long-winded Bishop--Corned beef 73-81 CHAPTER VIII DINNER (_continued_) A merry Christmas--Bin F--A _Noel_ banquet--Water-cress--How Royalty fares--The Tsar--_Bouillabaisse_--_Tournedos_--_Bisque_-- _Vol-au-vent_--_Pré salé_--Chinese banquets--A fixed bayonet--_Bernardin Salmi_--The duck-squeezer--American cookery--"Borston" beans--He couldn't eat beef 82-96 CHAPTER IX DINNER (_continued_) French soup--A regimental dinner--A city banquet--_Baksheesh_--Aboard ship--An ideal dinner--Cod's liver--Sleeping in the kitchen--A _fricandeau_--Regimental messes--Peter the Great--Napoleon the Great--Victoria--The Iron Duke--Mushrooms--A medical opinion--A North Pole banquet--Dogs as food--Plain unvarnished fare--The Kent Road cookery--More beans than bacon 97-110 CHAPTER X VEGETABLES