To whom it may concern—Some men advertise for fine stock, but not the case with me; I am looking for a wife. I am a lone man keeping house. I work every day and do not have a chance to find a wife. Any lady wishing to marry will please address me at Johnston City, Ill. Very respectfully, W. C. South. * * * * * =The Gentle Osteopath= (From the Osteopathic Physician.) Wanted—An assistant. Must be good mixer. Lady of good appearance and one with the goods would do. Address ——, care The O. P. * * * * * A concern advertises in The Chicago Tribune for an “office boy, 16 years old, with large corporation.” Isn’t that asking a good deal of one so young? ------------------------------------------------------------------------ =_Jest Jokes and Jingles_= =Father Said So= Tommy: “Do you go to bed very early, Mrs. Peck?” Mrs. Peck: “Yes, Tommy, sometimes—when I feel tired.” “You wouldn’t go so early if you were married to my father, would you?” “Oh, Tommy, you funny boy! Why not?” “’Cause my father told mother that if he were your husband he’d make you sit up and take notice.” * * * * * =Cause for Joy= Old King Cole Was a merry old soul, Don’t doubt it for a minute, He called for his pipe And he called for his bowl, And that bowl had “something” in it. * * * * * =A Stag Party= (From the Highland Park Press.) Mr. and Mrs. George D. Stagg, of San Bernardino, Calif., are the proud parents of a baby boy. Mr. Stagg is still in the military hospital. * * * * * =Listen To ’Em Rave= A recent robbery disclosed the fact that large quantities of whiskey have been sent to insane asylums for “medicinal” purposes. Men wishing to take the examination for insanity will please leave their names at the front office. The line forms to the right—don’t crowd. * * * * * “I’d like to get some soap,” she told the clerk. “Would you care for toilet soap?” the salesman asked. “No,” she replied. “I want it for my face.” * * * * * Adam was a wise guy, So they say; He shoved his rib against the fence And Eve came to next day. * * * * *