Spanish Flu is a disease. Spanish Fly is a drug, technically known as cantharides and is used as a plaster to cure rheumatism. * * * * * =Dear Billy=--I am infatuated with a handsome young man from Akron, Ohio, but when he comes to visit me in a neighboring village he acts so embarrassed and appears always to be in a mood of deep thought. Do you suppose he wants to pop the question but hasn’t the nerve?--=Hellenic Helen.= Now, Hellenic Helen, how in Hell’s Gate or Helena do I know? Overlook his seeming taciturnity and remember that “deep rivers move with silent majesty; small brooks are noisy as hell, and actions speak louder than words.” * * * * * =Dear Doctor Billy=--Please give me the definition of the spinal column.--=Slippery Lizz.= It’s a long disjointed bone, covered with knots--your head sits on one end and you sit on the other. * * * * * =Dear Captain Bill=--What is meant by “bigamy?” =Dandy Dillon.= Bigamy is a form of insanity which causes a man to pay three board bills instead of two. * * * * * =Dear Billy=--What’s the definition of a “humdinger?”--=Iva Hangover.= A man who can make a deaf and dumb girl say: “O, daddy.” * * * * * =Dear Bilious Billy=--I was married last June and my wife wants me to obtain some polish in my manners so suggests that I take music lessons. What do you think about it?--=Silas Hopkins.= It’s a very good idea, Si. You’ll soon gain a musical education by playing second fiddle. But beware of the jazz. * * * * * =Dear Skipper=--Why is a certain specie of beans called Navy Beans?--=Battle-Axe Liz.= I dunno, Liz. You might as well ask me why I labelled The Whiz Bang an “Explosion of Pedigreed Bull.” No reason at all. * * * * * =Dear Bill=--They say there are germs on money. Do you think, then, it is safe for a poor working girl to carry her salary home in her stocking?--=Sadie Woolworth.= Perfectly safe, I’d say. A germ couldn’t live on a working girl’s salary. * * * * * Betty’s Better Batter Betty Botter bought some butter, “But,” she said, “this butter’s bitter. If I put it in my batter, It will make my batter bitter. But a bit of better butter Will make my batter better.” So she bought a bit o’ butter Better than the bitter butter, And made her bitter batter better. So ’twas better Betty Botter Bought a bit of better butter. _Seeing Los Angeles_ By JACK ANDREWS