Captain Billy's Whiz Bang, Vol. 2. No. 13, October, 1920: America's Magazine of Wit, Humor and FilosophyVarious
General
Captain Billy's Whiz Bang, Vol. 2. No. 13, October, 1920: America's Magazine of Wit, Humor and Filosophy
Various
American wit and humor -- Periodicals
Women want marriage and a home. They should. And there are more women
than men. Even before the war there was, in Europe and America, an extra
sixth woman for every five men, and the sixth woman brings competition.
She bulls the market, and makes feminine sex solidarity impossible. And,
of course, added to that is the woman who requires three or four men to
make her happy, one to marry and support her, and one to take her to the
theatre and to luncheon at Delmonico’s, and generally fetch and carry for
her, and one to remember her as she was at nineteen and remain a bachelor
and have a selfish, delightful life, while blaming her.--Mary Roberts
Rinehart.
* * * * *
Move Over
Bridget failed to get up one morning to cook breakfast for the Smith
family. Instead she yelled downstairs that she was “pretty sick.”
Mr. Smith promptly summoned his family doctor who gave the “sick” servant
a thorough examination. The doctor was unable to find anything wrong with
Bridget.
“My good woman,” he said, “you’re not sick at all.”
“I know I’m not,” Bridget replied, “but the Smiths owe me $20 and I’m
going to stay in bed until they pay me.”
“Well, if that’s the case, move over; they owe me $50.”
_Golightly Highballs_
BY REV. “GOLIGHTLY” MORRILL.
Mexico
V. C. in Vera Cruz stands for Venereal City. “El Dictamen” is the leading
newspaper. It has only four pages, yet whole columns are filled with
advertised cures for scrofula, syphilis, locomotor-ataxia and all the
rotten ills that licentious Latin-America is heir to. The space we give
to weather reports on the front page, or to special news with extra
headlines, is given up here to nauseating advertisements. The first thing
one sees as he enters the plaza are billboards, walls and buildings with
sure-cure advertisements.
L. A. in Latin America stands for “licentious animals.” In Vera Cruz the
principal male pastime is to talk about girls and not of God. From 4 P.
M. to 2 A. M. men sit in the plaza portales drinking, smoking and talking
about the women who pass by. The leading subject of “town talk” is girls,
the one they went to the movie with last, the other one the night before,
and the one they hope to get tonight.
The people make themselves a sewer for immoral filth, court the devil
Lust that eats and burns up their blood; are spendthrifts of body and
soul; waste their inheritance to purchase dirty, loathed disease; pawn
their bodies to a dry-rot evil; make themselves patients for Lust’s
rendezvous, a hospital, where their bill of fare is pills, not beef, and
the doctor’s bill is longer than the moral law they have violated. What
I have written here about Vera Cruz morals applies to the rest of Mexico
where conditions are the same or worse.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account