Suddenly his voice took a different tone. "Look, I _will_ trust you;
with part of me, anyway. I've been caged up for nearly five years, for
something stupid I did, and for something that no matter how hard I try,
I can't convince myself was all my fault. I don't mean that Uske should
be blamed. But chance, and all the rest ... well, all I mean is it makes
me want out that much more. I want to be _free_. I nearly got myself
killed trying to escape from the mines. And a couple of people did get
killed helping me. All right, you got me out of that stainless steel
graveyard I wandered into back at the radiation barrier, and for that,
thanks. I mean it. But I'm not free yet. And I still want out, more than
anything in the world.
"Sure, I know that you want me to do something, but I don't understand
it yet. You say you'll tell me soon. Okay. But you're riding around in
my head like this, so I'm not free yet. If that's what I have to do to
get free, than I'll do it. But I'm warning you. If I see another crack
in the wall, another spot of light getting in, I'll claw my hands off
trying to break through and to hell with what you want. Because while
you're there, I can't be free."
Suddenly the light in the pantry flipped on. His sudden face went from
the tautness of his last speech to fear. He had been standing by the
side of a seven-foot porcelain storage cabinet. He jumped back to the
wall. Whoever had come in, a butler or caterer, was out of sight on the
other side. A hand came around the edge of the cabinet, reaching for the
handle. The hand was broad, wiry with black hair, and sported a cheap,
wide, brass ring set with an irregular shape of blue glass. As the door
opened, the hand swung out of sight. There was a clatter of dishes on
the shelves, the slide of crockery slipping over plastic racks, and a
voice. "All right there. You carry this one." Then a grunt, and the
_ker-flop_ of the latch as the door slammed to.
A moment later, the light, and John Koshar's hands and head, went out.
When Jon stepped forward again, he looked at the pantry, at the doors,
the cabinets. The familiarity hurt. There was a door that opened into
the main kitchen. (Once he had snagged a kharba fruit from the cook's
table and ran, as behind him a wooden salad bowl crashed to the floor.
The sound made him whirl, in time to catch the cook's howl and to see
the pale shreds of lettuce strewn across the black tile floor. The bowl
was still spinning. He had been nine.)
He started slowly for the door to the hallway that led to the dining
room. In the hall was a red wood table on which sat a free form
sculpture of aluminum rods and heavy glass spheres. That was unfamiliar.
Not the table, the sculpture.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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