England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
With a moan, Beresford hid his face in his hands. Dinner must be,
whosoever lives or dies--if the world were breaking up--if hope and love
had failed for ever. John stood for a moment against the more powerful
light of the gas in the hall, for his answer, and then, not getting any,
he had the grace to steal quietly away.
But this wonderful intrusion of the outer ordinary life disturbed the
melancholy assembly. It roused Beresford to a sense of what had
befallen him. He got up and began to pace up and down the long room, and
Cara’s sobs broke the silence, and Maxwell at the table, with a spasm in
his throat, compiled the certificate of the death. In what medical form
he put it I cannot tell; but he strained his conscience and said
something which would pass, which nobody could contradict; was not that
enough? ‘I hope I may never do anything more wicked,’ he said, muttering
to himself. The nurse came to call the child, which was the first thing
that had seemed natural to Cara in the whole miserable day’s
proceedings. She did not resist the command to go to bed, as they had
all resisted the invitation to dine. She got up quickly when nurse
called her, glad of something she was used to.
‘It’s the only place as we’re all fit for,’ said nurse, with a sigh of
weariness; ‘your poor papa, Miss Carry, as well as the rest.’ Then she
turned to the gentlemen with a touch of natural oratory. ‘What is the
use of talking,’ she said; ‘I’m one as has loved her since first she
drew breath. She was my child, she was; and look you here, I’m glad--her
old nurse is glad. I’ll not cry nor make no moan for her,’ said nurse,
the tears running down her cheeks. ‘I’d have give her that dose myself
if the darling had asked me; I would, and never have trembled. I’d have
done it and stood up bold and told you I done it, and I don’t blame her.
She’s seen what it was, and so have I.’
‘Nurse, you are a good woman,’ said the doctor, coming hastily forward
and grasping her hand. ‘Nurse, hold your tongue, and don’t say a word.
Don’t let those idiots talk downstairs. I’m ready to give them the
reason of it whoever asks. I did not know it would come on so quickly
when I left to-day; but I know what it is that has carried her off. It
was to be expected, if we hadn’t all been a parcel of fools.’
Nurse looked him anxiously in the face. ‘Then it wasn’t--it wasn’t?----
Ah!’ she added, drawing a long breath, ‘I think I understand.’
‘Now, hold your tongue,’ he cried, curtly, ‘and stop the others. You are
a sensible woman. My poor little Cara, good-night.’
‘Don’t speak to him,’ nurse whispered, drawing the child away. ‘Leave
your poor papa alone, darling. God help him, he can’t say nothing to you
to-night. Here’s Sarah coming to put you to bed, and glad I’d be to be
there too: it’s the only place as we’re fit for now.’
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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