The instinct of a woman, which, in these cases, never deceives her,
warned Marynia that she had made an uncommon impression on Zavilovski;
that that impression increased with every meeting. And this thought did
not make her indignant; she did not burst out with the angry question,
"How dare he?" since, for that matter, he had not dared anything,--on
the contrary, it gave her a certain comfort, certain confidence in
her own charm, which at moments she had begun to lose, but withal it
roused the greater sorrow that such honor, such enthusiasm, should
be shown her by some stranger, and not by "Stas." As to Zavilovski,
she felt nothing for him save a great sympathy and good-will; hence
her thoughts remained pure. She was incapable of amusing herself
through vanity by the suffering of another; and for that reason, not
wishing him to go too far, she associated herself willingly with the
plan of Pani Aneta of bringing him into more intimate relations with
Panna Castelli, though that plan seemed to her as abrupt as it was
unintelligible. Moreover, her heart and mind were occupied thoroughly
with the questions: Why does that kind, wise, beloved "Stas" not go to
the heights with her? why does he not value her as he might? why does
he only love her, but is not in love with her? why does he consider
her love as something belonging to him, but not as something precious?
whence is this, and where lies the cause of it?
Every common, selfish nature would have found all the fault in him;
Marynia found it in herself. It is true that she made the discovery
through foreign aid; but she was always so eager to remove from "Stas"
every responsibility, and take it on herself, that though it caused
fear, this discovery brought her delight almost.
Once, on an afternoon, she was sitting by herself, with her hands on
her knees, lost in thoughts and questions to which she could find no
answer, when the door opened, and in it appeared the white head-dress
and dark robe of a Sister of Charity.
"Emilka!" cried Marynia, with delight.
"Yes; it is I," said the Sister. "This is a free day for me, and I
wished to visit thee. Where is Pan Stanislav?"
"Stas is at the Mashkos, but he will return soon. Ah, how glad he will
be! Sit down and rest."
Pani Emilia sat down and began to talk. "I should run in oftener," said
she, "but I have no time. Since this is a free day, I was at Litka's.
If you could see how green the place is, and what birds are there!"
"We were there a few days ago. All is blooming; and such rest! What a
pity that Stas is not at home!"
"True; besides, he has a number of Litka's letters. I should like to
ask him to lend them to me. Next week I'll run in again and return
them."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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