Children's Ways: Being selections from the author's "Studies of childhood," with some additional matterSully, James
Science
Children's Ways: Being selections from the author's "Studies of childhood," with some additional matter
Sully, James
Child development; Child psychology
One other illustration of this keen childish dialectic when face to face
with the accuser deserves to be touched on. The sharpened faculties have
something of a lawyer's quickness in detecting a flaw in the indictment.
Any exaggeration into which a feeling of indignation happens to betray
the accuser is instantly pounced upon. If, for example, a child is
scolded for pulling kitty's ears and making her cry it is enough for the
little stickler for accuracy to be able to say: "I wasn't pulling
kitty's _ears_, I was only pulling _one_ of her ears". The ability to
deny the charge in its initial form gives him a great advantage, and
robs the accusation in its amended form of much of its sting. Whence, by
the way, one may infer that wisdom in managing children shows itself in
nothing more than in a scrupulous exactness in the use of words.
_The Plea for Liberty._
While there are these isolated attacks on various points of the daily
discipline, we see now and again a bolder line of action in the shape of
a general protest against its severity. Sometimes the parental authority
is contrasted unfavourably with that of some other mother. The small boy
who invented a family, _viz._, a mother called Mrs. Cock and her little
boys, frequently referred to this lady for the purpose of giving point
to protests against the severity of the real mother. "For instance
(writes the latter) when mother refuses her paint-box as a plaything,
or declines to supply unlimited note-paper for 'scwibbleation,'
a reproachful little voice is heard, 'Mrs. Cock always gives her
paint-box and all her paper to my little boys'. A pause. Then follows
suggestively: 'I fink she loves them vewy much'."[10] On the other
hand, if the child accepts the mother's plea, that she has to impose
restraints because she is a good mother, he is apt to wish that she were
a shade less good. A boy of four had one morning to remain in bed till
ten o'clock as a punishment for misbehaviour. He proceeded to address
his mother in this wise: "If I had any little children I'd be a worse
mother than you--I'd be quite a bad mother; I'd let the children get up
directly I had done my breakfast at any rate".
[10] From a published article by Mrs. Robert Jardine (compare
above, pp. 16, 17).
Enough has been said to illustrate the ways in which the natural child
kicks against the imposition of restraints on his free activity. He
begins by showing himself an open foe to authority. For a long time
after, while making a certain show of submission, he harbours in his
breast something of the rebel's spirit. He does his best to evade the
most galling parts of the daily discipline, and displays an admirable
ingenuity in devising excuses for apparent acts of insubordination. And,
lastly, where candour is permitted, he is apt to prove himself an
exceedingly acute critic of the system which is imposed on him.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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