Civilization in the United States: An inquiry by thirty Americans
General
Civilization in the United States: An inquiry by thirty Americans
United States -- Civilization
The grotesqueness, from either a social or psychological point of view,
would be too obvious to emphasize, if the implications of this attitude
towards divorce were not so significant of American attitudes at large
towards sex--attitudes of repression or deception. Of deception or
camouflage towards divorce there is one other conspicuous point I
should like to note. “Strictness of divorce” is commonly argued to be
protection of marriage for the sake of children, since brittle marriage
is destructive of the family life. It is safe to say that from no
contemporary discussion of divorce will this argument be omitted; and
it is equally safe to say that the rejoinder that divorce laws should
therefore discriminate between parents and non-parents will, by the
opponents of divorce, pass unheeded. That this distinction should be so
persistently ignored is accountable only, it seems to me, on the ground
of emotional self-deception. What else but a covert emotional attitude
could make tenable the irrationality, and what else is that attitude
but that joy in mating is of negligible value, that sex emotion, if not
a necessary evil, is at any rate a negligible good, deserving merely
of what surplus of attention may be available from the real business
of life? Indifference towards sex emotion is masked by concern for
offspring.
In France, we may note, this confusion between parenthood and mating
does not exist. The parental relation in both law and custom is highly
regulated, much more regulated than among English-speaking peoples,
but it is unlikely that it would be argued in France that mating and
parenthood were inseparable concepts. Unlikely, because the French
attitude towards sex differs so radically from the Anglo-Saxon.
To the French, as to many of the Continental peoples of Europe, sexual
interest is normally to be kept stimulated, neither covered over nor
suppressed. And in this case stimulation is seen to depend largely
upon the factor of interrelation. Sex-facts are to be related to other
facts of life, not rigidly or _a priori_, as in the American view that
mating is inseparable from parenthood, but fluently and realistically,
as life itself moves and finds expression. And sex-facts in European
opinion are to be interrelated in a philosophy of sex. Failure to make
these interrelations, together with the attitude of suppression, seem
to me to be the outstanding aspects of the characteristically American
attitude towards sex.
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