My father’s grave was in the churchyard of the little village which
clustered and nestled beyond our lodge. It was a real grave. The
thought of lying in a vault had always been loathsome to him, and he
said that it struck him cold. So fond was he of air and light and
freedom, the change of seasons and weather, and the shifting of the sun
and stars, that he used to pray that they still might pass over his
buried head; that he might lie, not in the dark lockers of death, but in
the open hand of time. His friends used to think it strange that a man
of so light and festive nature should ever talk of death; yet so he
often did, not morbidly, but with good cheer. In pursuance, therefore,
of his well-known wish, the vaults wherein there lay five centuries of
Vaughan dust were not opened for him; neither was his grave built over
with a hideous ash-bin; but lay narrow, fair, and humble, with a plain,
low headstone of the whitest marble, bearing his initials deeply carved
in grey. Through our warm love and pity, and that of all the village,
and not in mere compliance with an old usage of the western counties,
his simple bed was ever green and white with the fairest of low flowers.
Though otherwise too moody and reckless to be a gardener, I loved to
rear from seed his favourite plants, and keep them in my room until they
blossomed; then I would set them carefully along his grave, and lie down
beside it, and wonder whether his spirit took pleasure in them.
But more often, it must be owned, I laid a darker tribute there. The
gloomy channel into which my young mind had been forced was overhung, as
might be expected, by a sombre growth. The legends of midnight spirits,
and the tales of blackest crime, shed their poison on me. From the dust
of the library I exhumed all records of the most famous atrocities, and
devoured them at my father’s grave. As yet I was too young to know what
grief it would cause to him who slept there, could he but learn what his
only child was doing. That knowledge would at once have checked me, for
his presence was ever with me, and his memory cast my thoughts, as
moonlight shapes the shadows.
The view from the churchyard was a lovely English scene. What higher
praise can I give than this? Long time a wanderer in foreign parts,
nothing have I seen that comes from nature to the heart like a true
English landscape.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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