French fiction -- Translations into English; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Young men -- Fiction
The work finished, the old woman drew back a few paces the better to
scrutinize what she had done and note its effect. Then, satisfied, she
exclaimed:
"Ah! my child, you look like a girl of fifteen!"
Laurence smiled contentedly. Both of these creatures were sincere; they
frankly admired, not doubting in the least that a miracle had been
worked. Then, they remembered me. Laurence, proud of the restored charms
of her fifteenth year, came to embrace me, wishing to dazzle my eyes
with her newly-acquired beauty. Her bare shoulders had the fresh and
peculiar odor of a person who has just come out of a bath. At the touch
of her cold lips, damp with rouge, I shivered with disgust.
"Bear me in mind, my child," said Pâquerette, as she was leaving the
room. "Old women like sweetmeats."
We had yet two full hours to wait. I have no remembrance of any
weariness so terrible. This waiting for a pleasure which clashed with
all my tastes was indescribably uncomfortable and sad, and Laurence's
impatience retarded still more for me the slow march of the minutes.
She was seated upon the bed, in her costume of pink satin ornamented
with gilt spangles; this tinsel had the strangest effect in the world,
brought into bold relief by the smoky paper on the chamber walls. The
lamp burned dimly, the silence was broken only by the dashing of the
rain against the window panes. Brothers, I do not know what demon then
took possession of me, but I must admit to you, who know all my thoughts
and feelings, that, sitting in the presence of that woman, abandoned by
my cherished ideas, I caught myself wishing Laurence young and
beautiful; I desired the power to transform my miserable mansarde into a
delicious and mysterious retreat, a veritable nest for ideal happiness,
with every surrounding of luxury and magnificence. For the moment, I
lost all higher aspirations. What disgusted me was no longer vice, but
ugliness and poverty.
At last, I went for a carriage and we started for the ball. Despite the
lateness of the hour, the streets were still full of noise and light.
Bursts of laughter came from every corner, groups of drunkards and women
were in each drinking house. Nothing could be more odious to see than
the people running in the mud, and elbowing each other amid the refrains
of bacchanalian songs. Laurence, leaning out of the carriage window,
laughed heartily at this disgusting joy. She called to the passers-by,
seeking insult, happy at being able to participate in a war of rough
words. As I remained mute, she said to me:
"Well! what on earth are you doing? Do you intend to go to sleep while
you are taking me to the ball?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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