Confession; Or, The Blind Heart. A Domestic StorySimms, William Gilmore
General
Confession; Or, The Blind Heart. A Domestic Story
Simms, William Gilmore
Domestic fiction
“Do not mistake me. I hope nothing from your hundred dollars; indeed,
fifty will answer. I propose to employ it only as a pretext. I expect to
lose it, and lose it this very night. But it will give me an opportunity
to ascertain what I have suspected--too late, indeed, to save
myself--that I have been the victim of false dice and figured cards. You
say you will let me have the money--will you go with me--Will you see me
through?”
He extended his hand as he spoke, I grasped it. He shook it with a
hearty feeling, while a bright smile almost, dissipated the cloud from
his face.
“You are a man, Clifford; and now, would you believe it, our excellent,
immaculate young friend, Mr. William Edgerton, refused me this money.”
“Strange! Edgerton is not selfish--he is not mean! From THAT vice he is
certainly free.”
“By G-d, I don't know that! He refused me the money; refused to go with
me. I saw him at eight o'clock, at his own room, where he was rigging
himself out for some d---d tea-drinking; told him my straits, my losses,
my object and all; and what was his plea, think you? Why, he disapproved
of gambling; couldn't think of lending me a sixpence for any such
purpose; and, as for going into such a suspected quarter as a
gambling-house--wouldn't do it for the world! Was there ever such a
puritan--such a humbug!”
I did William Edgerton only justice in my reply;--
“I've no doubt, Kingsley, that such are his real principles. He would
have lent you thrice the money, freely, had not your object been
avowed.”
“But what a devil sort of despotism is that! Can't a friend get drunk,
or game, or swagger? may he not depart from the highway, and sidle into
an alley, without souring his friend's temper and making him stingy?
I don't understand it at all. I'm glad, at least, to find you are of
another sort of stuff.”
“Nay, Kingsley, I will lend you the money--go with you, as you desire;
but, understand me, I do not, no more than Edgerton, approve of this
gambling.”
“Tut, tut! I don't want you to preach, though I could hear you with a
devilish sight better temper than him. There's a hundred things that
one's friend don't approve of, but shall he desert him for all that?
Leave him to be plucked, and kicked, and abandoned; and, moralizing,
with a grin over his fain, say, 'I told you so!' No! no! Give me the
fellow that'll stand by me--keep me out of evil, if he can, but stand by
me, nevertheless, at all events; and not suffer me to be swallowed up at
the last moment, when an outstretched finger might save!”
“But, am I to think, Kingsley, that my help can do this?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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