Confessions of the CzarinaRadziwill, Catherine, Princess
History
Confessions of the Czarina
Radziwill, Catherine, Princess
Alexandra, Empress, consort of Nicholas II, Emperor of Russia, 1872-1918; Russia -- Court and courtiers
For months this kind of thing went on. Alexandra Feodorowna knew herself
to be watched with anything but kind eyes, and this consciousness of the
ill-will of which she was the object added to her anxiety and moral
sufferings. As the weary months dragged on, she thought more and more of
Orloff, and suddenly she realized that she loved him more than any one
in the world, and she began to understand all that she must have cost
him, in pain and vain regret.
But for her, at least, consolation was at hand. One July morning the
Imperial Family were called together with the principal Court and State
functionaries in all haste to Peterhof. The long-expected event was at
hand, and a few hours would decide as to the future of the Romanoff
dynasty. People with anxious faces thronged the vast halls of the
Palace, waiting for news which seemed to be very long in coming.
At last, just as the clock struck noon, a doctor entered the room, and
told the assistants that Nicholas II. was the father of a son.
There was one person present who listened to this announcement with an
impassible face but with a breaking heart, and who could barely find
sufficient strength to reach the little cottage where Anna Wyrubewa was
sitting pale and anxious, in expectation of--she did not know well
herself what. When she saw Colonel Orloff she extended toward him her
two hands in a gesture of passionate greeting. But what was her surprise
to see him fall on the sofa beside her and bury his head in the silk
cushions, with such sobs as rarely shake the frame of a strong man. He
had had the courage to sacrifice his personal happiness at the shrine of
the woman whom he adored with such religious fervor, but it was more
than he could bear to find how thoroughly this sacrifice had been
accepted by Providence, and for just a few minutes he had hated this
new-born child, whom he knew but too well was going to usurp the place
he had hoped to keep forever in the heart and the affections of
Alexandra Feodorowna.
XIII
HE DIED TO SAVE HER HONOR
The christening of the little Grand-Duke Alexis was solemnized with
great pomp at Peterhof, and there is no doubt but that the position of
his mother became, after his birth, quite different from what it had
been before this much-wished-for baby had appeared. For one thing, the
talk of a divorce between her and the Czar, which had been so frequently
indulged in, came to an end, and it was felt, even by the most bitter
enemies of the Empress, that it would be waste of time to think about
the possibility of its ever taking place.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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