Humorous stories; Reporters and reporting -- Fiction; Women authors -- Fiction
“—said: ‘Folks, I just had a wire from mother, up in Maine. The boy has
the croup. I’m scared green. I hate to spoil the party, but don’t ask
me to stay. I want to go home to the flat and blubber. I didn’t even
stop to take my make-up off. My God! If anything should happen to the
boy!—Well, have a good time without me. Jim’s waiting outside.’” A
silence.
Then—“Who was Jim?” asked Flossie, hopefully.
“Jim was her husband, of course. He was in the same company.”
Another silence.
“Is that all?” demanded Sally from the corner in which she had been
glowering.
“All! You unnatural girl! Isn’t one husband enough?”
Mrs. Whalen smiled an uncertain, wavering smile. There passed among the
three a series of cabalistic signs. They rose simultaneously.
“How quaint you are!” exclaimed Mrs. Whalen, “and so amusing! Come
girls, we mustn’t tire Miss—ah—Mrs.—er—” with another meaning look at
my bare left hand.
“My husband’s name is still Orme,” I prompted, quite, quite pleasantly.
“Oh, certainly. I’m so forgetful. And one reads such queer things in
the newspapers now-a-days. Divorces, and separations, and soul-mates
and things.” There was a note of gentle insinuation in her voice.
Norah stepped firmly into the fray. “Yes, doesn’t one? What a comfort
it must be to you to know that your dear girls are safe at home with
you, and no doubt will be secure, for years to come, from the buffeting
winds of matrimony.”
There was a tinge of purple in Mrs. Whalen’s face as she moved toward
the door, gathering her brood about her. “Now that dear Dawn is almost
normal again I shall send my little girlies over real often. She must
find it very dull here after her—ah—life in New York.”
“Not at all,” I said, hurriedly, “not at all. You see I’m—I’m writing a
book. My entire day is occupied.”
“A book!” screeched the three. “How interesting! What is it? When will
it be published?”
I avoided Norah’s baleful eye as I answered their questions and
performed the final adieux.
As the door closed, Norah and I faced each other, glaring.
“Hussies!” hissed Norah. Whereupon it struck us funny and we fell, a
shrieking heap, into the nearest chair. Finally Sis dabbed at her eyes
with her handkerchief, drew a long breath, and asked, with elaborate
sarcasm, why I hadn’t made it a play instead of a book, while I was
about it.
“But I mean it,” I declared. “I’ve had enough of loafing. Max must
unpack my typewriter to-night. I’m homesick for a look at the keys. And
to-morrow I’m to be installed in the cubbyhole off the dining-room and
I defy any one to enter it on peril of their lives. If you value the
lives of your offspring, warn them away from that door. Von Gerhard
said that there was writing in my system, and by the Great Horn Spoon
and the Beard of the Prophet, I’ll have it out! Besides, I need the
money. Norah dear, how does one set about writing a book? It seems like
such a large order.”
CHAPTER IV.
DAWN DEVELOPS A HEIMWEH
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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