Her low voice had a certain tremor of repressed emotion in it as she
said: "But think of Sir Henry. The bridegroom is part of the wedding,
after all; think of what he is. What can you care for in him? Nothing. I
don't see how you could. And he is twice your age. Be a brave girl, and
break it off."
Di felt as she said the last words that the courage of being able to
break off the engagement was as nothing to that of continuing to keep
it. She did not realize that an entire lack of imagination wears, under
certain circumstances, the appearance of the most stoical fortitude.
The brave girl sobbed again, and pressed a little frilled square of
cambric to her eyes.
"No," she gasped; "I can't--I can't! It has been in all the papers. Half
my things are ordered; I have asked the bridesmaids. I can't go back
now. It is wicked to break off an engagement. God would be very angry
with me."
It is difficult to argue with any one who can make a Jorkins of the
Almighty. Every word Madeleine spoke showed her friend how unavailing
any further remonstrance would be. Di saw that she had gone through that
common phase of imagination which a shallow nature feels to be
prophetic. Madeleine had, in what stood proxy for her imagination,
already regarded herself as a bride, as the recipient, not of diamonds
in general, but of the Verelst diamonds in particular. Already in
maiden meditation she had seen herself arrive at certain houses on
bridal visits--had contemplated herself opening a county hunt ball as
the bride of the year--until she looked upon the wedding as a settled
event, the husband as a necessary adjunct, the _trousseaux_ as a
certainty.
"And you must see my under-things when they come, because we have always
been such friends," continued Madeleine, as Di remained silent. She
dried her eyes with little dabs, for even in emotion she remembered the
danger of wiping them, while she favoured Di with minute details
respecting those complete sets of under-clothing which so mysteriously
enhance and dignify the holy estate of matrimony in the feminine mind.
But Di was not listening. The image of Sir Henry, who had besought
herself to marry him a year ago, reverted to her mind with a
remembrance of her own repulsion towards the Moloch to which Madeleine
was preparing to offer herself up.
"Madeleine," she said suddenly, "I am sure from what I have seen that
marriage is too difficult if you don't care for your husband. The
married people who did not marry for love tell one so by their faces. I
am sure there are some hard times to be lived through even when you care
very much. Nothing but a great love, granny says, will float one over
some of the rocks ahead. But to marry without love is like undertaking
to sew without a needle, or dig without a spade--attempting difficult
work without the tool provided for it. Oh, Madeleine, don't do it! Break
it off--break it off!"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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