There isn't a thing wrong with ordering three eggs sunny-side up, and
three over easy, and three poached ever so soft, and six of them
scrambled. What law says a man should have all of his eggs fixed alike?
Nor is there anything wrong with ordering five cups of coffee. That way
the girl doesn't have to keep running over with refills.
Bascomb Swicegood liked to have bacon and waffles after the egg
interlude and the earlier courses. But he was nearly at the end of his
breakfast when he jumped up.
"What did she say?"
He was surprised at the violence of his own voice.
"What did who say, Mr. Swicegood?"
"The girl that was just here, that just left with the other girl."
"That was Teresa, and the other girl was Agnes. Or else that was Agnes
and the other girl was Teresa. It depends on which girl you mean. I
don't know what either of them said."
Bascomb ran out into the street.
"Girl, the girl who said it rained dirty green all the time, what's
your name?"
"My name is Teresa. You've met me four times. Every morning you look
like you never saw me before."
"I'm Agnes," said Agnes.
"What did you mean it rained dirty green all the time? Tell me all
about it."
"I will not, Mr. Swicegood. I was just telling a dream I had to Agnes.
It isn't any of your business."
"Well, I have to hear all of it. Tell me everything you dreamed."
"I will not. It was a dirty dream. It isn't any of your business. If
you weren't a friend of my Uncle Ed Kelly, I'd call a policeman for
your bothering me."
"Did you have things like live rats in your stomach to digest for you?
Did they--"
"Oh! How did you know? Get away from me. I _will_ call a policeman. Mr.
McCarty, this man is annoying me."
"The devil he is, Miss Ananias. Old Bascomb just doesn't have it in him
any more. There's no more harm in him than a lamp post."
"Did the lamp posts have hair on them, Miss Teresa? Did they pant and
swell and smell green--"
"Oh! You couldn't know! You awful man!"
"I'm Agnes," said Agnes; but Teresa dragged Agnes away with her.
"What is the lamp-post jag, Bascomb?" asked Officer Mossback McCarty.
"Ah--I know what it is like to be in hell, Mossback. I dreamed of it
last night."
"And well you should, a man who neglects his Easter duty year after
year. But the lamp-post jag? If it concerns anything on my beat, I have
to know about it."
"It seems that I had the same depressing dream as the young lady,
identical in every detail."
* * * * *
Not knowing what dreams are (and we do not know) we should not find
it strange that two people might have the same dream. There may not
be enough of them to go around, and most dreams are forgotten in the
morning.
Bascomb Swicegood had forgotten his dismal dream. He could not account
for his state of depression until he heard Teresa Ananias telling
pieces of her own dream to Agnes Schoenapfel. Even then it came back to
him slowly at first, but afterwards with a rush.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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