Bildungsromans; Psychological fiction; Young women -- Fiction
He flung it. It alighted in the middle of the pond. It stuck--oh,
horror!--upright, caught in something, and refused to sink.
‘Oh, Roddy!’
It stared at them across the waste of waters, stark, forlorn,
reproachful. It said: ‘Why did you pick me up, encourage and befriend me
when this is what you meant to do?’
‘Well, come on,’ said Roddy.
They fled from it.
They fled from it, but ah!--it pursued them. From miles away it wailed
to Judith in a high thin squeak: ‘Save me! Save me!’ They made excuses
to each other for spoiling the paper chase, and going back the same way.
Their feet were compelled, driven.
The pond lay fair and flawless in the evening light. The umbrella was
drowned.
Roddy stood at the edge and bit his lip. He said:
‘Well, I almost wish I hadn’t thrown the poor old chap away.’
She nodded. She could not speak.
The place was haunted for ever.
But what remained more deeply in her memory was the bond with Roddy, the
sharing of an emotion, the secret sympathy. Avidly she seized upon it,
and with it nourished her immoderate ambitions. One day they would all
like her better than anyone else: even Roddy would tell her every thing.
Their lives, instead of being always remote and mysterious would revolve
intimately round her. She would know all, all about them.
* * * * *
From that far off unsubstantial time Roddy’s face was the last, the
clearest, the strangest to float up.
There was a field with chalky pits in it and ripening blackberries and
wastes of gorse and bracken. The curious smell of the bracken rose
faint but penetrating, earthy and yet unreal, disturbing.
She was staring in horror at a dead rabbit lying in the path. It was
stretched on its side with its tiny frail-boned paws laid out quiet, and
the tender secret white fur of its underneath half revealed. One of
them--which?--she could never remember--said:
‘Well, I never thought I’d touch it.’
It was like hearing a person speak in a bad dream.
‘How did you do it?’ said Roddy’s voice.
‘Well, it was sitting, and I crept up and chucked a stone to startle it
up, not meaning to hurt it. But I must have hit it plumb behind the
ear,--I killed it outright anyway. It was an absolute fluke. I couldn’t
do it again if I tried all my life.’
‘Hum,’ said Roddy. ‘Funny thing.’
He stood with his hands in his pockets looking down at the corpse,
making his face a mask. The sun wavered and darkened. The surface of the
bracken shone with a metallic light, the grass was lurid, the trees
hissed. Judith struggled in a nightmare.
‘Well, what shall I do with it?’ said someone.
‘I’ll see to it,’ said Roddy.
Then he and she were alone. She bent down and touched the fur. It was
dead, it was dead. She fell on her knees beside it and wept.
‘I say, _don’t_,’ said Roddy after a bit. He could not bear tears.
She wept all the more, awful sobs from the pit of the stomach.
‘He didn’t mean it, it can’t be helped,’ said Roddy. Then after another
interval:
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account