Without directly attacking this pride, he prevented it from
developing into hardness of heart; and without depriving me of my
self-esteem, he made me less scornful of my neighbours. By continually
drawing my attention from the empty show, and directing it to the
genuine sufferings concealed by it, he taught me to deplore the
faults of my fellows and feel for their sufferings, to pity rather
than envy them. Touched with compassion towards human weaknesses
through the profound conviction of his own failings, he viewed
all men as the victims of their own vices and those of others; he
beheld the poor groaning under the tyranny of the rich, and the
rich under the tyranny of their own prejudices. "Believe me," said
he, "our illusions, far from concealing our woes, only increase them
by giving value to what is in itself valueless, in making us aware
of all sorts of fancied privations which we should not otherwise
feel. Peace of heart consists in despising everything that might
disturb that peace; the man who clings most closely to life is the
man who can least enjoy it; and the man who most eagerly desires
happiness is always most miserable."
"What gloomy ideas!" I exclaimed bitterly. "If we must deny ourselves
everything, we might as well never have been born; and if we must
despise even happiness itself who can be happy?" "I am," replied
the priest one day, in a tone which made a great impression on me.
"You happy! So little favoured by fortune, so poor, an exile and
persecuted, you are happy! How have you contrived to be happy?"
"My child," he answered, "I will gladly tell you."
Thereupon he explained that, having heard my confessions, he would
confess to me. "I will open my whole heart to yours," he said,
embracing me. "You will see me, if not as I am, at least as I
seem to myself. When you have heard my whole confession of faith,
when you really know the condition of my heart, you will know why
I think myself happy, and if you think as I do, you will know how
to be happy too. But these explanations are not the affair of a
moment, it will take time to show you all my ideas about the lot
of man and the true value of life; let us choose a fitting time and
a place where we may continue this conversation without interruption."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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