In the great Dutch war, in the reign of Charles II., the English fleet and that of Holland fought in the Channel for three days successively; engaging in the day, and lying-to at night. But, just as they were preparing to renew the action, advice came off that an armistice had been concluded, and the hostile parties began to exercise mutual civilities. On board a Dutch man of war, which lay alongside of an English first-rate, was a sailor so remarkably active, as to run to the mast head and stand upright upon the truck, after which he cut several capers, and concluded with standing on his head, to the great astonishment and terror of the spectators. On coming down from his exploit, all his countrymen expressed their joy by huzzahing, and thereby signifying their triumph over the English. One of the British tars, piqued for the honour of his country, ran up to the top like a cat, and essayed, with all his might, to throw up his heels as the Dutchman had done; but, not having the skill, he missed his poise, and came down rather faster than he went up. The rigging, however broke his fall, and he lighted on his feet unhurt. As soon as he had recovered his speech, he ran to the side, and exultingly cried out to the Dutchmen, “There, d--n your eyes, do that if you can.” PUN UPON PUN. Strange, Moore, and Wright, three notorious punsters, were on a certain occasion dining together, when Moore observed, “There is but one knave among us, and that’s _Strange_.” “Oh no,” said Wright, “there is one _Moore_.” “Ay,” said Strange, “that’s _Wright_.” CAT O’ NINE TAILS. The captain of one of the British frigates, a man of undaunted bravery, had a natural antipathy to a cat. A sailor who, from misconduct, had been ordered a flogging, saved his back by presenting to his captain the following petition:-- By your honour’s command A culprit I stand-- An example to all the ship’s crew; I am pinioned and stript, And condemned to be whipt, And if I am flogged--’tis my due! A cat I am told, In abhorrence you hold: Your honour’s aversion is mine!-- If a cat with one tail Makes your stout heart to fail, O, save me from one that has nine! PUNCTILIO. The students at Oxford stand much upon punctilio in the matter of making acquaintance; insomuch that one will not hold the least intercourse with another, unless the proper formula of introduction has been gone through. It is told, as a quiz upon them for this peculiarity, that a young gentleman, who had recently entered one of the colleges, happening to be seized with cramp while bathing in the Isis, and being on the point of sinking, probably to rise no more, a youth of older standing, who leant over a bridge near the scene, thus soliloquized:--“Good God! what a pity I was not introduced to that fresh-man--perhaps I might have saved him.” MAKING FREE.