Aristocracy (Social class) -- Fiction; Europe -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
"Of course you know what I wished in telling you this," I said, rising.
"She is evidently a charming creature, and the best thing he can do is to
marry her. I wished to interest you in that view of it."
She had taken one of the roses from the vase and was arranging it in the
front of her dress. Suddenly, looking up, "Leave it to me, leave it to
me!" she cried. "I am interested!" And with her little blue-gemmed hand
she tapped her forehead. "I am deeply interested!"
And with this I had to content myself. But more than once the next day I
repented of my zeal, and wondered whether a providence with a white rose
in her bosom might not turn out a trifle too human. In the evening, at
the Kursaal, I looked for Pickering, but he was not visible, and I
reflected that my revelation had not as yet, at any rate, seemed to
Madame Blumenthal a reason for prescribing a cooling-term to his passion.
Very late, as I was turning away, I saw him arrive--with no small
satisfaction, for I had determined to let him know immediately in what
way I had attempted to serve him. But he straightway passed his arm
through my own and led me off towards the gardens. I saw that he was too
excited to allow me to speak first.
"I have burnt my ships!" he cried, when we were out of earshot of the
crowd. "I have told her everything. I have insisted that it's simple
torture for me to wait with this idle view of loving her less. It's well
enough for her to ask it, but I feel strong enough now to override her
reluctance. I have cast off the millstone from round my neck. I care
for nothing, I know nothing, but that I love her with every pulse of my
being--and that everything else has been a hideous dream, from which she
may wake me into blissful morning with a single word!"
I held him off at arm's-length and looked at him gravely. "You have told
her, you mean, of your engagement to Miss Vernor?"
"The whole story! I have given it up--I have thrown it to the winds. I
have broken utterly with the past. It may rise in its grave and give me
its curse, but it can't frighten me now. I have a right to be happy, I
have a right to be free, I have a right not to bury myself alive. It was
not _I_ who promised--I was not born then. I myself, my soul, my mind,
my option--all this is but a month old! Ah," he went on, "if you knew
the difference it makes--this having chosen and broken and spoken! I am
twice the man I was yesterday! Yesterday I was afraid of her; there was
a kind of mocking mystery of knowledge and cleverness about her, which
oppressed me in the midst of my love. But now I am afraid of nothing but
of being too happy!"
I stood silent, to let him spend his eloquence. But he paused a moment,
and took off his hat and fanned himself. "Let me perfectly understand,"
I said at last. "You have asked Madame Blumenthal to be your wife?"
"The wife of my intelligent choice!"
"And does she consent?"
"She asks three days to decide."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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