FIRST ENGLISH TOURIST [_shouting_]. Don't you see that's what they are waiting for? As a gentleman you should grant them this pleasure and so escape the humiliation of undergoing tortures before this mob. SECOND ENGLISH TOURIST. Sir William. TOURIST [_ecstatically_]. See? It's true. Aleck, Jimmie, it's true. What a tragedy! SEVERAL TOURISTS [_going for the Englishman_]. How dare you? FIRST ENGLISH TOURIST [_shoving them aside_]. Hurry up and fall! Do you hear? If you haven't the backbone I'll help you out with a pistol shot. VOICES. That red-haired devil has gone clear out of his mind. POLICEMAN [_seizing the Englishman's hand_]. You have no right to do it, it's against the law. I'll arrest you. SOME TOURISTS. A barbarous nation! [_The unknown man shouts something. Excitement below._] VOICES. Hear, hear, hear! UNKNOWN MAN [_aloud_]. Take that jackass away to the devil. He wants to shoot me. And tell the boss that I can't stand it any longer. VOICES. What's that? What boss? He is losing his mind, the poor man. TOURIST. Aleck! Mary! This is a mad scene. Jimmie, you remember Hamlet? Quick. UNKNOWN MAN [_angrily_]. Tell him my spinal column is broken. MARY [_wearily_]. Papa, children, he's beginning to kick with his legs. KATE. Is that what is called convulsions, papa? TOURIST [_rapturously_]. I don't know. I think it is. What a tragedy? ALECK [_glumly_]. You fool! You keep cramming and cramming and you don't know that the right name for that is agony. And you wear eyeglasses, too. I can't bear it any longer, papa. TOURIST. Think of it, children. A man is about to fall down to his death and he is bothering about his spinal column. [_There is a noise. A man in a white vest, very much frightened, enters, almost dragged by angry tourists. He smiles, bows on all sides, stretches out his arms, now running forward as he is pushed, now trying to escape in the crowd, but is seized and pulled again._] VOICES. A bare-faced deception! It is an outrage. Policeman, policeman, he must be taught a lesson! OTHER VOICES. What is it? What deception? What is it all about? They have caught a thief! THE MAN IN THE WHITE VEST [_bowing and smiling_]. It's a joke, ladies and gentlemen, a joke, that's all. The people were bored, so I wanted to provide a little amusement for them. UNKNOWN MAN [_angrily_]. Boss! THE MAN IN THE WHITE VEST. Wait a while, wait a while. UNKNOWN MAN. Do you expect me to stay here until the Second Advent? The agreement was till twelve o'clock. What time is it now? TALL TOURIST [_indignantly_]. Do you hear, ladies and gentlemen? This scoundrel, this man here in the white vest hired that other scoundrel up there and just simply tied him to the rock. VOICES. Is he tied? TALL TOURIST. Yes, he is tied and he can't fall. We are excited and worrying, but he couldn't fall even if he tried.