First Love: A Novel. Vol. 2 of 3Loudon, Mrs. (Margracia)
General
First Love: A Novel. Vol. 2 of 3
Loudon, Mrs. (Margracia)
Fiction
The assurance of a _friendship_ so exclusive, so much in unison with
her own ideas on the subject, and still more the tender and agitated
tone in which words so kind were uttered, banished every thought of
Lady Susan, and in one moment restored Julia to perfect happiness. For
reply, she only lifted her eyes to his. Their expression seemed to him,
at the moment, to justify him in pressing her hand to his lips, though
afterwards he thought he had done very wrong. So much accustomed was
Julia, however, to consider the establishment of perfect confidence
between herself and Edmund, as quite necessary and right, that in all
this she saw but the kind reconciliation of _friends_, and never dreamed
of being surprised, as some more experienced ladies might have been, that
no fuller or tenderer declaration followed, neither apology, for having
approached so near to such.
She now felt quite certain that Edmund still loved her better than any
one else in the world; and, therefore, she was happy. He thought his
secret still safe, because he saw he had not given offence: indeed he
saw more! Suspicions, delightful suspicions fluttered at his heart. He
watched the brightening of her features: yes, he could not refuse to
admit the flattering, the intoxicating conviction, that the more his
love betrayed itself, the happier Julia evidently was! Thoughts like
these ought to have filled him with sorrow and repentance; but they did
not—they caused a joy that no words can paint! and this was not a moment
to resist its influence. He was gazing upon the countenance of Julia, she
had just looked up to express kindness and confidence, tears of pleasure
had started into her eyes, and now she was looking down again perhaps to
hide them; but they were stealing into view over cheeks that glowed with
an animating, a beautifying confusion, which could not be termed a mere
blush, for it visibly betrayed conscious happiness as well as bashfulness.
Words that, while possessed of reason, he had determined never to utter,
literally trembled on his lips. But honour, gratitude, principle, flew to
his aid, and rescued him from the eternal remorse, which, in a mind like
his, must have followed an avowal of sentiments, it was so much his duty
to conceal. He was enabled to be silent—but to withdraw his eyes from
the contemplation of the lovely being before him, to close his heart
against the dangerous bliss that contemplation afforded, was impossible!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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