Bildungsromans; Fathers and sons -- Fiction; First loves -- Fiction; Ireland -- Fiction
Perhaps I should here attempt some slight description of my father,
whom I have already mentioned, and of my home. My father was the
National schoolmaster at Newcastle, County Down, and our house was next
door to the school. My bedroom window looked out over the sea, about
a hundred yards away, and behind the house were the Mourne Mountains,
and the Derryaghy estate, which took in the lower slopes of Slieve
Donard. Our house, when the Virginian creeper that covered it was red,
looked pretty enough from the road, but was poorly and even meagrely
furnished. The most that could be said for it was that it was clean
and tidy. The few attempts at ornamentation would have been better
away――the two or three pictures, the hideous vases on the mantelpiece.
My father had a strong liking for illuminated texts, and there were
several of these, in gilt frames, in every room in the house, including
the kitchen and the bath-room. What furniture there was was modern,
cheap, and objectionable: it was characteristic of my father that he
had never even bought himself a comfortable arm-chair.
He was a tall man, thin and grizzled, pale, and dressed always in an
ill-cut, ready-made, black tail-coat and waistcoat, with dark gray
trousers. I always disliked his clothes, especially the two shining
buttons at the back of his coat. He wore a beard and moustache, both
somewhat ragged, and his brown eyes were indescribably melancholy. His
hands and feet were very coarse and large. There was power in his face,
but there was a depressing lack of anything approaching geniality. He
gave me the impression that he did everything from a sense of duty,
and nothing because he took a pleasure in it. The seriousness of his
expression was truly portentous: it was impossible that anything in
the world could matter so much as that. He was not well-off――that is
obvious from the position he occupied――but he lived in a way that was
unnecessarily economical. He was by no means ungenerous if it were
some case of distress that had come to his knowledge, but in ordinary
life he was excessively near. The only luxuries he had ever permitted
himself were these coloured texts, and they cost little.
When I was with him I never felt quite at my ease, and this made me
sulky and perpetually on the defensive. I was not more with him than
I could help, and as we lived alone together, with only an old woman
who came in every day to look after the house and do the cooking, it
must have been easy for him to see that I avoided his society. I never
pretended to myself to have any particular affection for him, and I
don’t even know that it would have mended matters if I had.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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