“No risk--if you marry for the right motive. I haven’t found out what
that is: not money; not duty--only prigs do their duty; not impulse;
certainly not love.”
“Can one marry for peace?”
“Maybe. Peace is a great thing; I’ve found that since dear Tim went
away and took his imaginary incurable troubles with him. I would write
over every baby girl’s cradle: ‘DON’T MARRY A DYSPEPTIC!’
“Must you really go? Here is Nancy’s latest photograph.” She took it
from the table. “Of course you have one. Nancy is just the average
woman--insatiable desire to have herself photographed in evening-dress.
Nancy is stupid; she actually believed that a Papal Bull was a live
animal. Just wit enough to dress her magnificent hair according to the
latest fashion plate--that’s Nancy! She’s callous, too. The other day
she ran down one of the Peter Buckman children when she was cycling.
She only said calmly that it ‘was bad for the wheel.’ Fortunately the
child wasn’t hurt.”
Pamela went home in bright moonlight; it was only a stone’s throw from
the Buttery to Folly Corner.
She thought calmly of her future as she walked: the moon, the sweet,
crisp March night cooled and stilled her. She was not going to marry
for love. To marry for love had once been the dear dream of her life.
But that was over; the prison had engulfed her poor romance--it had
been a mean one at the best. It was all over--the first wild, keen
shame and rebellion, the steadfast belief in him, the passionate
waiting for the future. It was all over--dead. She was going to marry
Jethro; going to take refuge in his kindliness--as if he were a wayside
barn on a wet day. She meant to be a good wife, a happy wife. Nothing
was more contemptible than a tiresome, melancholy woman with a past.
CHAPTER VIII.
SHE was loitering in the drawing-room next morning when Jethro came in.
There was a strong touch of out-door sweetness about him. He was not
one of those men who smell of hot rooms and tobacco.
He went up and kissed her, taking her fair round face reverently in his
hands as a matter of course. She was thrilled, not with love, but with
pleasure at the open adoration in his light blue eyes. His great hands
placed gently under her chin, his fine head well set on his broad
shoulders, and his big limbs in the breeches and gaiters, stirred in
her the primitive passion of woman for brute strength in a man.
He threw himself on the couch and blinked lazily at the gewgaws of the
room, which his very presence always made so trivial. Then he lugged
out his worn brown pocket-book and took from it a slip of paper roughly
torn from a newspaper. Directly she saw it Pamela’s cheeks blazed, and
the same agonized shame and degradation which she had felt on her first
visit to that room she felt then.
“Come here.”
He spoke gently, yet with command; the voice of a man who after
marriage will tell his wife to fetch his slippers or his pipe, as if
service were a matter of course.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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