They were silent for a little. He was feeling unhappy and, curiously
enough, frightened. He would have liked to jump up suddenly and shout,
“Well, what's going to happen now?”--not only to Norah Monogue, but to
London, to all the world. The work at the book had, during these years,
upheld him with a sense of purpose and aim. Now, feeling that that work
was bad, his aim seemed wasted, his purpose gone. Here were seven years
gone and he had done nothing--seen nothing, become nothing. What was his
future to be? Where was he to go? What to do? He had reasoned blindly
to himself during these years, that “Reuben Hallard” would make his
fortune--now that seemed the very last thing it would do.
“I knew what you're feeling,” she said, “now that the book's done,
you're wondering what's coming next.”
“It's more than that. I've been in London seven years. Instead of
writing a novel that no one will want to read I might have been getting
my foot in. I might at any rate have been learning London, finding my
way about. Why,” he went on, excitedly, “do you know that, except for
a walk or two and going into the gallery at Covent Garden once or twice
and the Proms sometimes and meeting some people at Herr Gottfried's once
or twice I've spent the whole of my seven years between here and the
bookshop--”
“You mustn't worry about that. It was quite the right thing to do. You
must remember that there are two ways of learning things. First through
all that every one has written, then through all that every one is
doing. Up to now you've been studying the first of those two. Now you're
ready to take part in all the hurly-burly, and you will. London will
fling you into it as soon as you're ready, you can be sure.”
“I've been awfully happy all this time,” he went on, reflectively.
“Too happy I expect. I never thought about anything except reading and
writing the book, and talking to you and Gottfried. Now things will
begin I suppose.”
“What kind of things?”
“Oh, well, it isn't likely that I'm going to be let alone for ever. I've
never told you, have I, about my life before I came up to London?”
She hesitated a little before she answered. “No, you've never told me
anything. I could see, of course, that it hadn't been easy.”
“How could you see that?”
“Well, it hadn't been easy for either of us. That made us friends. And
then you don't look like a person who would take things easily--ever.
Tell me about your early life before you came here,” Norah Monogue said.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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