FER. Quite right; but before you get the wine, let's put the old woman away somewhere. In the first place, she isn't a pleasant sight; and, in the second place, if any one came in they might be startled. Where shall she go? MR. W. (_pointing to cupboard_). I should like to put her in the coal-hole. Would that cupboard do? FER. The very thing. Lend me a hand with her. You must do this part of the business carefully,--that's the one objection to the process. A frozen body like this would break to pieces if you dropped it, and you don't want that. MR. W. I don't see why I shouldn't--she's often boasted of having broken me. (_They carry_ MRS. WATMUFF _into cupboard, and close the door on her_.) MR. W. And now come, Ferdinand, and give me a light in the cellar. (_Exit_ FERDINAND SWIFT _and_ MR. WATMUFF, _door_ R.) MRS. W. (_appearing at door of cupboard_). Varlets! Varlets! I say. Oh, that the spirits of my parents should witness this day! For some wives it is ordained that their husbands shall, so to speak, fly in their faces,--my most miserable husband has _smoked_ in mine! Bitterly shall he rue it. My thanks are indeed due to that worthy young man, whom I fear I have misjudged, who apprised me of my danger; otherwise I might now be a stark and frozen body. By keeping open the door of this cupboard I can hear all that goes on, and I shall be an interested witness of the junketings which will now take place. (_Retires into cupboard._) WALTER (_appearing cautiously from behind screen_). Fortune favors me. This is glorious! She already thinks she has misjudged me. Emily, my darling, I foresee that you will be mine. (_Crosses and goes off, door_ L.) (_Enter_, _door_ R., MR. WATMUFF, _and_ FERDINAND SWIFT, _each carrying a decanter of wine; both are smoking_.) MR. W. Aha! The coast is clear. FER. (_filling a glass of wine and "eying" it_). And so is the wine. (_Drinks._) MR. W. Put the bottles on this table, Ferdinand, and bring two chairs. Now we will try and make the best of things until we have your dear aunt with us again. (_Drinks._) It _is_ a good glass of wine,--isn't it, Ferdinand? FER. Excellent. Does every credit to your judgment. MR. W. Ah! you were almost a baby when I laid it down, Ferdinand, and it's never been disturbed. I can assure you, my dear boy, I've passed whole days in picturing to myself its condition, and wondering who would be lucky enough to drink it. This is really a wonderful discovery of yours. You see, your aunt-- FER. Oh, I know. Have another cigar? MR. W. Thank you, Ferdinand, I don't mind if I do. It's a sin to smoke with such good wine as this; but, you see, I must make hay while the sun shines. The fact is, your aunt-- FER. Don't speak of it, uncle--don't speak of it. I quite understand it; but, after all, you're not the only man with a skeleton in the cupboard. MR. W. A skeleton! Aha! If she only was, Ferdinand--if she only was. (_Drinks another glass of wine._)