Freezing a Mother-in-Law; or, Suspended Animation: A farce in one actPemberton, T. Edgar (Thomas Edgar)
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Freezing a Mother-in-Law; or, Suspended Animation: A farce in one act
Pemberton, T. Edgar (Thomas Edgar)
Comedy plays; English drama -- 19th century
MR. W. What a heartless ruffian! How easily he takes it all,
and how little he feels for me! How different are our lots! He goes to
America: I have to remain here--here, in this awful house, with this
dread mystery locked up in a cupboard. If anything happens, it is he
who is guilty, and not I; and yet I dare not interfere with his
departure, for my only chance depends upon his safe return with the
antidote. And how am I to pass the time until he does return? What
schemes must I not invent to Emily and the servants to account for the
prolonged absence of Mrs. Watmuff! How am I to explain away the
continually locked cupboard? There can be no earthly chance for me.
Mrs. Watmuff will be missed--will be searched for--will be found--and
long before that wretched nephew of mine returns with her restorative,
she will be in her grave, and I shall have been hung as her murderer.
As these and a thousand other horrible results of my mad act rush
through my disordered mind, my brain is on fire, and I feel that I am
going mad. One chance, and one only, remains to me. Ferdinand
_may_ find the remedy at his hotel: if so, he and my poor wronged
wife will want a warm bath. Thank goodness, there is one thing that I
can do. I will go and see that the water is hot. (_Exit_ MR.
WATMUFF, _door_ R.)
(MRS. WATMUFF _appears at door of cupboard_.)
MRS. W. Poor conscience-stricken imbecile! Oh! my parents, what must
you not have thought during the last half-hour! Teach me in the future
how to deal with this most miserable and misguided of men.
(WALTER LITHERLAND _and_ EMILY _enter door_ L., _talking_.)
WALTER. Yes, Emily, I must say farewell.
MRS. W. (_aside_). How! He here again? Now can I learn the real
sentiments of these young people. I do not forget the timely warning of
the young man, and shall be glad to find that he has been misjudged. My
parents, I thank you for the opportunity thus vouchsafed me.
(MRS. WATMUFF _retires into the cupboard_.)
WALTER (_aside to_ EMILY). It's all right; she's still there; I heard
her. (_Aloud._) Let us sit, dearest (_places two chairs close to
cupboard_), and I will explain to you all that I mean--all that I feel.
EMILY. Walter, I will do so, because I know that our parting is at
hand; otherwise, after my dear mother's expressed wish that we should
see each other no more, I could not have consented to converse alone
with you.
WALTER. Your tender allusion to your mother, Emily, makes my task a
comparatively easy one. I confess that my object in seeking this
interview was that I might, tenderly and devotedly, bid you farewell.
EMILY. I knew it. Something in your manner, Walter, told me that it was
to be so; and though my heart will break at our parting, I shall know
that it is only some wise purpose which induces you to leave me.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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