FER. (_taking their arms and walking up and down_). Quite possible, and the good of it simply incalculable. Father of family finds things bad,--freezes, or suspends animation of family, and puts them on shelves until times mend. Man thinks he ought to give up horses, but doesn't like to sell old favorites,--freezes, or suspends their animation till price of hay and corn comes down, and things generally go up. Man has wife who makes things unpleasant at home,--freezes or suspends his animation till she comes round. WALTER. There is hardly novelty in that notion. Men before now have, under such circumstances, suspended themselves. FER. With a rope. Yes. But how much better is my plan! A few drops of this colorless liquid (_producing bottle_) injected into lobe of ear of patient will freeze, or suspend animation of patient, during will of practitioner. Remedy, few drops of another liquid injected into lobe of other ear, and warm bath. MR. W. Upon my soul, it's a grand idea. WALTER. The great difficulty which you will have to deal with will be to get some one to submit himself to the experiment. FER. Walter, you're a sharp fellow. You've hit the right nail on the head. That _is_ the difficulty. It is really astounding how blind and how selfish people are in advancing the interests of science. In the States they can't get a soul to try it, and they've got to wait for the first felon. MR. W. The first felon? FER. Yes. First man condemned to death, you know. Then they'll give him his choice--suspend his animation either by rope or patent freezing mixture. If he recovers from the latter, give him his life and liberty. WALTER. Then you admit that there is a certain amount of risk attached to the experiment? FER. I admit nothing of the sort. There isn't the least risk. WALTER. Then why do not _you_ submit yourself to the ordeal? FER. Damme, sir, don't you understand that as the proprietor of the patent I couldn't safely show any one how to bring me to life again? There's only one man could do it, and that's the American inventor; and he's such a devilish grasping fellow that when he hears I've brought the thing over here without consulting him, he'd be capable of keeping me suspended indefinitely. MR. W. Then how do you mean to proceed? FER. Oh! look out for a felon. England is the best field for that sort of thing, and that's why I came over here. I'm not going to ask any more private individuals. I'm sick of it, and won't give myself the pain of receiving any more refusals. I confess I've buoyed myself up with the hope that I should find a felon in my own family, which would make things easy and pleasant for me. Is there one, uncle? I said good-by to a lot of cousins who promised well in that direction. MR. W. No, Ferdinand, there isn't one. FER. Hard lines, because there must be one soon. WALTER. But, failing a felon, what shall you do? FER. I see only one course open--I must marry, and freeze my wife.