City and town life -- Fiction; Romance fiction, American; Short stories, American
Miggy is as thin as a bough, and her rather large head is swept by an
ungovernable lot of fine brown hair. Her face was turned from me, and
she was wearing a high-necked gingham apron faded to varying values of
brown and faint purple and violet of a quite surprising beauty. When the
last stroke ceased, she turned to me as if I had been there all the
time.
"I wish I could hear it do that again," she said, standing where she had
stood, arms folded.
"You will, perhaps, to-morrow," I answered.
Truly, if it was to be Miggy, then she would hear the chimes to-morrow
and to-morrow; and as she turned, my emotion of finality increased. I
have never loved the tribe of the Headlongs, though I am very sorry for
any one who has not had with them an occasional innocent tribal junket;
but I hold that through our intuitions, we may become a kind of
apotheosis of the Headlongs. Who of us has not chosen a vase, a chair, a
rug, by some motive transcending taste, by the bidding of a
friendly-faithful monitor who, somewhere inside one, nodded a choice
which we obeyed? And yet a vase is a dead thing with no little seeking
tentacles that catch and cling, while in choosing the living it is that
one's friendly-faithful monitor is simply recognizing the monitor of the
other person. I, for one, am more and more willing to trust these two to
avow their own. For I think that this monitor is, perhaps, that silent
Custodian whom, if ever I can win through her elusiveness, I shall know
to be myself. As the years pass I trust her more and more. I find that
we like the same people, she and I! And instantly we both liked Miggy.
Miggy stood regarding me intently.
"I saw you go past the Brevy's yesterday, where the crape is on the
door," she observed; "I thought it was you."
I wonder at the precision with which very little people and very big
people brush aside the minor conventions and do it in such ways that one
nature is never mistaken for the other.
"The girl who died there was your friend, then?" I asked.
"No," Miggy said; "I just knew her to speak to. And she didn't always
bother her head to speak to me. I just went in there yesterday morning
to get the feeling."
"I beg your pardon. To get--what?" I asked.
"Well," said Miggy, "you know when you look at a corpse you can always
sense your own breath better--like it was something alive inside you.
That's why I never miss seeing one if I can help. It's the only time I'm
real glad I'm living."
As I motioned her to the chair and took my own, I felt a kind of
weariness. The neurotics, I do believe, are of us all the nearest to the
truth about things, but as I grow older I find myself getting to take a
surpassing comfort in the normal. Or rather, I am always willing to have
the normal thrust upon me, but my neurotics I wish to select for myself.
"My neighbour tells me," I said merely, "that she thinks you should be
my secretary." (It is a big word for the office, but a little hill is
still a hill.)
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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