“O, those girls! Naughty, laughing, beautiful girls.”—_Old Song._ I commenced boarding in a new place to-day, and am completely smitten by the charming table girl— Oh, she is young and bright and fair, With midnight eyes and inky hair, Which unconfined, without a check, Falls round a plump and snowy neck. Oh, sweet she bends above my chair Like Juno, when old Jove’s her care, And as she stoops to hear me speak, Soft falls her breath upon my cheek, And I forget (true as I live) The order that I fain would give. Before her dark and earnest eyes My appetite distracted flies, And though I hungry sit me down, I rise full as a country clown Who by a picnic table stands, And shovels in with both his hands. ’Tis true, at times the humble board Does but a scant repast afford; At times we grumble at the bread, Or at the butter shake the head; And oft the whisper circles round About the mystery profound, That may within the hash repose, And any fateful stir disclose. But still we linger, still we stay, And hope for better things each day; Thus proving that one winning face Can keep from bankruptcy the place. [Illustration] AN OLD WOMAN IN PERIL. Yesterday, while in the back country, I saw an old woman in what would have been a very laughable predicament, had it not been a very pitiable one. An unusually large vulture had for some time been soaring in the neighborhood, occasionally scraping acquaintance with one of the fat ewes grazing in the valley. Several of the farmers had felt the vexation of seeing him perched upon a lofty eminence and making the wool fly from some favorite Cotswold. They were justly enraged, and resolved to put a stop to his depredations. They accordingly posted themselves nigh their flocks, and with guns heavily charged, awaited the advent of the rapacious bird. But he was no booby, and though his gizzard could digest a good-sized rib or hoof with all the ease of a Ballyshannon woman making away with a mealy potato, yet he hadn’t the least inclination to test its grinding power upon a charge of slugs or buckshot.