Accordingly, I started for Cowes, and was welcomed at the pier with all
my host’s habitual and vivacious hospitality. Scarcely were we seated in
our wicker-chairs in face of the Solent, not twinkling as usual with
pleasure-sails, but sinister with strange instruments of warfare, than
he began the attack. “What am I to do with myself?” was the instant
question; “what means can I find of occupying this dreadful void of
leisure?” To which the obvious reply was: “First of all, you must exhibit
to me the famous attractions of Cowes!” “There are none,” he replied
in comic despair, but we presently invented some, and my visit, which
extended over several radiant days of a perfect August, was diversified
with walks and excursions by land and water, in which my companion
was as active and as ardent as though he had been nineteen instead of
seventy-nine. In a suit picturesquely marine, with his beautiful silver
hair escaping from a jaunty yachting cap, he was the last expression of
vivacity and gaiety.
The question of his intellectual occupation in the future came, however,
incessantly to the front; and our long talks in the strange and uncanny
solitude of the Royal Yacht Squadron Castle always came back to this:
What task was he to take up next? His large autobiography was now coming
back to him from the printers in packets of proof, with which he was
closeted night and morning; and I suggested that while this was going on
there was no need for him to think about future enterprises. To tell the
truth, I had regarded the “Memories” as likely to be the final labour
of Lord Redesdale’s busy life. It seemed to me that at his advanced
age he might now well withdraw into dignified repose. I even hinted so
much in terms as delicate as I could make them, but the suggestion was
not well received. I became conscious that there was nothing he was so
little prepared to welcome as “repose”; that, in fact, the terror which
possessed him was precisely the dread of having to withdraw from the
stage of life. His deafness, which now began to be excessive, closed to
his eager spirit so many of the avenues of experience, that he was more
than ever anxious to keep clear those that remained to him, and of these,
literary expression came to be almost the only one left. In the absence
of a definite task his path in this direction led through darkness.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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