The town itself is disagreeable; but then, all around, you find an
inexpressible beauty of Nature. This induced the late Count M---- to
lay out a garden on one of the sloping hills which here intersect each
other with the most charming variety, and form the most lovely valleys.
The garden is simple; and it is easy to perceive, even upon your first
entrance, that the plan was not designed by a scientific gardener, but
by a man who wished to give himself up here to the enjoyment of his own
sensitive heart. Many a tear have I already shed to the memory of its
departed master in a summer-house which is now reduced to ruins, but
was his favourite resort, and now is mine. I shall soon be master of
the place. The gardener has become attached to me within the last few
days, and he will lose nothing thereby.
May 10.
A wonderful serenity has taken possession of my entire soul, like these
sweet mornings of spring which I enjoy with my whole heart. I am alone,
and feel the charm of existence in this spot, which was created for the
bliss of souls like mine. I am so happy, my dear friend, so absorbed in
the exquisite sense of mere tranquil existence, that I neglect my
talents. I should be incapable of drawing a single stroke at the
present moment; and yet I feel that I never was a greater artist than
now. When, while the lovely valley teems with vapour around me, and the
meridian sun strikes the upper surface of the impenetrable foliage of
my trees, and but a few stray gleams steal into the inner sanctuary, I
throw myself down among the tall grass by the trickling stream; and as
I lie close to the earth, a thousand unknown plants are noticed by me:
when I hear the buzz of the little world among the stalks, and grow
familiar with the countless indescribable forms of the insects and
flies, then I feel the presence of the Almighty, who formed us in his
own image, and the breath of that universal love which bears and
sustains us, as it floats around us in an eternity of bliss; and then,
my friend, when darkness overspreads my eyes, and heaven and earth seem
to dwell in my soul and absorb its power, like the form of a beloved
mistress,--then I often think with longing, Oh, would I could describe
these conceptions, could impress upon paper all that is living so full
and warm within me, that it might be the mirror of my soul, as my soul
is the mirror of the infinite God! O my friend--but it is too much for
my strength--I sink under the weight of the splendour of these visions!
May 12.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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