Graham's Magazine, Vol. XXXV, No. 2, August 1849Various
General
Graham's Magazine, Vol. XXXV, No. 2, August 1849
Various
Literature -- Periodicals; Literature, Modern -- 19th century -- Periodicals
this subject, and gradually grew in all things less communicative
regarding herself, as if doubting the response of sympathy. There was
evidently a constraint placed on her spontaneous emotions—a quiet
concealment of her deeper interests, which to me spoke mournfully, and
recalled that silent, dejected consciousness of mental and spiritual
solitude, which is the saddest portion and the most touching consequence
of an orphan’s unshared and melancholy destiny. It was not until long
afterward that I learned the domestic trials and annoyances to which she
had been subjected, and the dreary, joyless routine in which she dragged
on the years that should have been her brightest ones.
It was with many a sweet anticipation of friendly, unreserved
intercourse and affectionate solace—such dreams as are borne by loving
angels to hearts strong in youth and rich in tenderness, that I looked
impatiently forward to my next meeting with my old playmate, for now we
had both glided from childhood to womanhood, and the firm bond was
between us that links those who remember together. I shall never forget
my astonishment when, after our first fond and impetuous greeting, I
turned, with tearful eyes, to mark the alteration time had wrought in
the appearance of my companion. She was calm and composed, almost to
coldness, and there was no visible exhibition of the agitation
struggling beneath, or of all the afflicting reminiscences which I knew
were recalled by looking on my face again. She had grown from the timid,
irresolute girl, to the proud, self-possessed woman, and her manner had
the tranquil air of one aware of her own moral strength, and of the
existence of impulses and feelings too pure and sacred to be lightly
displayed to a world which had nothing in common with them. She was more
beautiful than ever, and I have never seen a being whose polished,
intellectual tranquillity was so faultlessly graceful. She had acquired
the early maturity of mind given in kindness to those who are tried in
their youth; for she had evidently “thought too long and darkly;” her
feelings were still from their intensity, and hers was the reflective
repose which, wearied and desponding, folds its drooping pinions and
sleeps on the bosom of darkness.
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