Grey Wethers: A Romantic NovelSackville-West, V. (Victoria)
General
Grey Wethers: A Romantic Novel
Sackville-West, V. (Victoria)
Great Britain -- Social life and customs -- 20th century -- Fiction; Romance fiction; Social classes -- Fiction
The snow lay deeper than ever, after another heavy fall, upon the
Downs, but although still a prisoner her restlessness had left her:
the life she had wanted came now to her from without. Olver brought
that life; he brought tumult, anguish, but it was life that he brought,
besieging her. And although he was not Lovel’s envoy, still it was
straight from Lovel that he came. His eyes, as they flamed on Clare,
an hour earlier had been filled with Lovel; she could fancy Lovel’s
image still lingering in them. And after he had left her, it was to
Lovel’s presence that he would return; he would hear Lovel’s voice and
see Lovel’s hands, that so haunted her. Once she broke her silence to
ask about Lovel, “What does he do, these days of snow? does he get out?
stay at home?” and Olver answered, “To-day he has been twisting new
snares, and last night he brought home a lamb that still lies by our
fire.”
She knew that an end must come; beleaguered, she knew that. She had
pushed life away, but it had followed her, even into her retreat. It
was useless; Calladine was not life; his need of her had not been life.
He was a shadow, a man of pretence, sufficient to himself, with his
own pretences for company. It was only the true solitaries, the really
lonely people, like Lovel, who had absolute need of their chosen loves.
The strong, clamping loves, that fastened on to one another, to lose
their hold only when they lost their hold on life; the unalterable,
ordained loves. She could not justify the argument; her selfishness
towards Calladine remained unjustified. But she knew that that would
not weigh with her; she and Lovel would reach one another when the day
came, even through a stone wall.
Still she could not justify it. She tried to, perfunctorily. She sat
frowning, and saying the words over to herself. Selfishness, duty.
They remained mere words; she could not feel them in her blood, as
she felt her need for Lovel and Lovel’s need for her; they were words
pitted against instinct. Was it love, that need? Was it no more than
that ordinary miracle, love? She thought that it was more. They had
the Downs as a bond between them; the Downs, and all nature, of which
Lovel seemed the spirit, the incarnation. He was the darkness of the
Downs, their threat, their solitude, their intractability; she was
their light, their windiness, their sunlit flanks, their springiness of
turf. United, they formed a whole. There was an essential significance
in Lovel, as there was an essential insignificance in Calladine.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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