At that touch and that voice the world seemed to give a sort of
bewildering half-turn. I hardly know how to express it, but at once it
seemed not awful--not even unusual--for portraits to become flesh--only
most natural, most right, most unspeakably fortunate.
I laid my hand on hers. I looked from her to my portrait. I could not
see it in the firelight.
"We are not strangers," I said.
"Oh no, not strangers." Those luminous eyes were looking up into
mine--those red lips were near me. With a passionate cry--a sense of
having suddenly recovered life's one great good, that had seemed wholly
lost--I clasped her in my arms. She was no ghost--she was a woman--the
only woman in the world.
"How long," I said, "O love--how long since I lost you?"
She leaned back, hanging her full weight on the hands that were clasped
behind my head.
"How can I tell how long? There is no time in hell," she answered.
It was not a dream. Ah, no--there are no such dreams. I wish to God
there could be. When in dreams do I see her eyes, hear her voice, feel
her lips against my cheek, hold her hands to my lips, as I did that
night--the supreme night of my life? At first we hardly spoke. It seemed
enough--
"... after long grief and pain,
To feel the arms of my true love
Round me once again."
* * * * *
It is very difficult to tell this story. There are no words to express
the sense of glad reunion, the complete realization of every hope and
dream of a life, that came upon me as I sat with my hand in hers and
looked into her eyes.
How could it have been a dream, when I left her sitting in the
straight-backed chair, and went down to the kitchen to tell the maids I
should want nothing more--that I was busy, and did not wish to be
disturbed; when I fetched wood for the fire with my own hands, and,
bringing it in, found her still sitting there--saw the little brown head
turn as I entered, saw the love in her dear eyes; when I threw myself at
her feet and blessed the day I was born, since life had given me this?
Not a thought of Mildred: all the other things in my life were a
dream--this, its one splendid reality.
"I am wondering," she said after a while, when we had made such cheer
each of the other as true lovers may after long parting--"I am
wondering how much you remember of our past."
"I remember nothing," I said. "Oh, my dear lady, my dear sweetheart--I
remember nothing but that I love you--that I have loved you all my
life."
"You remember nothing--really nothing?"
"Only that I am yours; that we have both suffered; that----Tell me, my
mistress dear, all that you remember. Explain it all to me. Make me
understand. And yet----No, I don't want to understand. It is enough that
we are together."
If it was a dream, why have I never dreamed it again?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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