During whole days and nights I looked at one point in the ceiling. I was
as if conscious, but indifferent to all things; I cared not for life,
nor death, nor the persons watching over my bed. I received impressions,
saw everything that was passing around me, remembered everything, but I
had not strength to collect my thoughts, I had not strength to feel.
One evening it seemed evident that I was dying. A great yellow candle
was placed near my bed; then I saw Father Ludvik in his vestments. He
gave me the sacrament, then he put the holy oil on me, and after that he
sobbed so that he came near losing consciousness. They carried my mother
out in a faint. Kazio was howling at the wall and tearing his hair. My
father was sitting with clasped hands; he was just as if petrified. I
saw all of this perfectly, but was perfectly indifferent; and I looked
as usual with dead, glassy eyes on the ceiling, on the edge of the bed
or the foot of it, or at the window, through which were coming in milky
and silvery bundles of moonlight.
Then, through all doors, the servants began to push into the room,
crying, sobbing, and howling. Kazio led them in, and they filled the
whole room; but my father sat there as stony as before. At last when all
had knelt down, the priest began the Litany, but stopped, for he could
not go on from tears. My father sprang up suddenly, and bellowing, "O
Jesus! O Jesus!" threw himself his whole length on the floor.
At that moment I felt that the points of my toes and my feet were
beginning to grow cold; a certain wonderful drowsiness seized me, and a
yawning. "Ah! now I am dying!" thought I, and fell asleep.
But instead of dying I fell asleep really, and slept so well that I did
not wake till twenty-four hours later, and so greatly strengthened that
I was unable to understand what had happened. My indifference had
vanished; my powerful young constitution had conquered death itself, and
was roused to new life and new forces. Now again there were such scenes
of delight at my bed that I shall not attempt to describe them. Kazio
was simply frantic from happiness.
They told me later that immediately after the duel, when my father
carried me wounded to the house, and the doctor could not answer for my
life, they had to shut up the honest Kazio, for he was simply hunting
Selim like a wild beast, and he swore that if I died he would shoot the
Tartar at sight. Fortunately Selim too was wounded somewhat, and had to
lie a time in bed.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account