_Mother._ "WHY, DOCTOR, HE WAS AT A JUVENILE PARTY LAST NIGHT, AND I'M AFRAID HE'S EATEN SOMETHING THAT DOES'N'T AGREE WITH HIM, POOR DEAR!"] CONVERSATION-BOOKS FOR 1851. It is said that Publishers are getting up a series of Conversation-Books for the use of foreigners, visiting the Great Exhibition. But the spoken and written language of London are so different that it is feared these books will be of little use. Mr. PUNCH furnishes the following corrections of the two most important chapters, by the diligent study of which it is hoped that visitors may be enabled to ride and dine. TO CONVERSE WITH A CABMAN. _What the Book said._ _What the Man said._ Do you wish, Sir, to ride in C'b? (_from every driver on my cabriolet? the rank, and as many fingers held up as there are Cabmen._) Where do you wish, Sir, that Vere to? (_and a look._) I should drive you? I wish to go to the Exposition. Thank you, Sir. I will drive Vere? (_not understanding you thither without delay. the foreigner's English._) What is your fare? I have driven you two miles. Two bob and a tanner. My legal fare for driving you that distance is one shilling and four-pence. As you have driven fast, there is one shilling and sixpence. Thank you, Sir, I am very much obliged Vot's this? (_and a look of to you. contemptuous curiosity at the coin presented._) I shall be happy to drive you in future. Vel, if hever I drives a scaly furrinrr again, I'm blessed! Good morning to you, Sir. Ollo! You ain't a-goin' hoff in this 'ere way. You have paid me handsomely. Oh--you calls yourself a gentleman! TO CONVERSE WITH A WAITER. Waiter, what have you for dinner? You can have what you choose to order, Sir. Din'r, Sir!--Yezzir! Here is the bill of fare, Sir. S'p, f'sh, ch'ps, st'ks, cutl't, Sir! r'nd o' b'f, Sir!--nice cut, Sir!--sad'l mt'n, Sir!--Yezzir! --JOHN, att'nd to the gnl'm.--Yezzir!--JEM, mon'y--com'n, Sir!--'Ere, Sir!--Yezzir! Waiter, how much have I to pay? Here, Sir, is your bill. Money! (_calling._)