not feel for others. Having got out of the stream into still
water, I go round and round in my own little circle. This
supposed deterioration you will ascribe to my humility;
therefore I add that Mr. Brown could not help remarking the
difference between what I am and what I was, and observed on
seeing my picture, which was taken at Calcutta for Mr. Simeon,
and is thought a striking likeness, that it was not Martyn that
arrived in India, but Martyn the recluse.
_February 10._--To-day my affections seem to have revived a
little. I have been often deceived in times past, and
erroneously called animal spirits joy in the Holy Ghost. Yet I
trust that I can say with truth, 'To them who believe, He is
precious!' Yes, Thou art precious to my soul, my transport and
my trust. No thought now is so sweet as that which those words
suggest--'_In Christ_.' Our destinies thus inseparably united
with those of the Son of God, what is too great to be expected?
All things are yours, for ye are Christ's! We may ask what we
will, and it shall be given to us. Now, why do I ever lose sight
of Him, or fancy myself without Him, or try to do anything
without Him? Break off a branch from a tree, and how long will
it be before it withers? To-day, my beloved sister, I rejoice in
you before the Lord, I rejoice in you as a member of the mystic
body, I pray that your prayers for one who is unworthy of your
remembrance may be heard, and bring down tenfold blessings on
yourself. How good is the Lord in giving me grace to rejoice
with His chosen all over the earth; even with those who are at
this moment going up with the voice of joy and praise, to tread
His courts and sing His praise. There is not an object about me
but is depressing. Yet my heart expands with delight at the
presence of a gracious God, and the assurance that my separation
from His people is only temporary.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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