Here and There in LondonRitchie, J. Ewing (James Ewing)
General
Here and There in London
Ritchie, J. Ewing (James Ewing)
London (England) -- Description and travel
The tellers go to the bar, and thence in a row march up to the table, at
which they are met by the clerk, to whom they give the result of the
division. Already the House knows which side has won from the way in
which the tellers are placed, the tellers of the victorious party being
on the right side. And now the division is announced from the chair, the
triumphant party cheer, and the House, if it be late, almost immediately
adjourns. Out bound honourable M.P.’s as schoolboys out of school. Glad
enough are they the thing is over; and, lighting their cigars—it is
astonishing what smokers honourable gentlemen are—not unreluctantly do
they go home. Following their example, we exchange the noisy and heated
house for the chill and silent night. Yet, as we go, we cannot help
observing, how generally well-behaved and patient the House has even been
to unutterable bores. It is seldom they put a man down, or are
boisterous or rude. A man of no party easily gets a hearing; but he
cannot secure attention. The House is polite, not cordial—civil, but not
encouraging. Accordingly the multitude, the second and third-rate
men—that is, all except a dozen—do not attempt to speak to the House at
all, but to the gallery, and, through the press, to their constituents.
If the speeches were not reported, they would, in most cases, be made
shorter and better. For instance, your own representative Smithers made
a speech. The weak-minded politicians of Rottenborough class Smithers as
A 1; and when he tells them what a fire-eater he is in the House, and
what things he says to government, they wonder Smithers has not been
committed to the Tower for high treason by the base and brutal myrmidons
of power. Now, what are the actual facts? While Smithers was speaking,
the House very still—and perhaps, with the exception of an understrapper
of the Treasury, enjoying a five minutes’ snooze, or deep in a
statistical calculation, not a soul was on the government benches at
all—nobody listened to Smithers; yet, on went Smithers stuttering
incoherently, reading from his notes with fearful pauses between,
screaming at the top of his voice, sawing the air with his arms in the
manner of the unhappy Mr. Frederick Peel, amidst universal indifference,
save when occasionally a good-natured friend timidly called out, “Hear,
hear.” The Speaker, perhaps, was chatting with an acquaintance about his
next parliamentary levée; if Smithers had stood on his head, I almost
question whether any one would have been aware of the fact; and Smithers
sits down, as he rises, without any particular mark of approval at all.
Why, then, does Smithers speak? Why, because the Press is there—to
treasure up every word—to note down every sentence—to let the British
nation see what Smithers said. This, of course, is a great temptation to
Smithers to speak when there is no absolute necessity that Smithers
should open his mouth at all. Yet this has its advantages—on the morrow
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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