Hobson's Choice: A Lancashire Comedy in Four ActsBrighouse, Harold
General
Hobson's Choice: A Lancashire Comedy in Four Acts
Brighouse, Harold
English drama -- 20th century; Fathers and daughters -- Drama; Sisters -- Drama
ALICE. I dare say. But you'll not speak as well as he did, so we can
leave it with a good wind-up. I'm free to own you took me by surprise,
Will.
FREDDY. Very neat speech indeed. (_Rising_.)
VICKEY. Who taught you, Will?
WILLIE. I've been learning a lot lately.
ALICE. I thought that speech never came natural from Will.
MAGGIE. I'm educating him.
FREDDY. Very apt pupil, I must say.
MAGGIE. He'll do. Another twenty years and I know which of you three men
'ull be thought most of at the Bank.
FREDDY. That's looking ahead a bit.
MAGGIE. I'll admit it needs imagination to see it now.
ALBERT (_rising and moving slightly_ C.). Well, the start's all
right, you know. Snug little rooms. Shop of your own. And so on. I was
wondering where you raised the capital for this, Maggie.
MAGGIE. I? You mustn't call it my shop. It's his.
ALICE. Do you mean to tell me that Willie found the capital?
MAGGIE. He's the saving sort.
ALICE. He must be if you've done this out of what father used to pay
him.
MAGGIE. Well, we haven't. Not altogether. We've had help.
ALBERT. Ah!
VICKEY. It's a mystery to me where you got it from.
MAGGIE. Same place as those flowers, Albert.
ALBERT. Hot-house flowers, I see. (_He rises and examines them_.) I was
wondering where they came from.
(VICKEY _and_ FREDDY _smell flowers_.)
MAGGIE. Same place as the money, Albert.
ALBERT. Ah!
ALICE (_rising and following him_, C.). Well, I think we ought to be
getting home, Maggie.
MAGGIE (_rising, as do the rest_. VICKEY _and_ FREDDY _move up stage_).
I shouldn't marvel. I reckon Tubby's a bit tired of looking after the
shop by now, and if father's wakened up and come in--
ALICE. That's it. I'm a bit nervous.
MAGGIE. He'll have an edge on his temper. Come and put your hats on.
(_She is going_ L., _with_ ALICE _and_ VICKEY, _then stops_.)
Willie, we'll need this table when they're gone. You'd better be
clearing the pots away.
WILLIE (_by table_, R.) Yes, Maggie.
(MAGGIE _turns to_ L.)
FREDDY. But--you--
ALBERT. Oh, Lord!
(_They laugh_.)
MAGGIE (_quite calmly_). And you and Fred can just lend him a hand with
the washing up, Albert.
FREDDY. Me wash pots!
VICKEY (_really outraged_). Maggie, we're guests.
MAGGIE. I know. Only Albert laughed at Willie, and washing up 'ull maybe
make him think on that it's not allowed.
(_She ushers_ ALICE _and_ VICKEY _out_, L., _and follows_. WILLIE
_begins to put pots on tray which he gets from behind screen, up_ L.)
ALBERT (_after he and_ FRED _have looked at each other, then at_ WILL,
_then at each other again_). Are you going to wash up pots?
FREDDY. Are you?
ALBERT. I look at it like this myself. All being well, you and I are
marrying into this family and we know what Maggie is. If we start giving
in to her now, she'll be a nuisance to us all our lives.
FREDDY. That's right enough, but there's this plan of hers to get us
married. Are you prepared to work it for us?
ALBERT. I'm not. Anything but--
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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