And now we come to the last and most considerable division of the
subject--our visitors; comprising relatives, friends, and strangers. If
we lived in Arcadia, or in the Colonies, we should most likely be so
glad to see our friends that we should joyfully run to welcome them. Or
if we were very great people indeed, we should not mind doing as Queen
Victoria does, going to receive them at the moment of their arrival.
But as we are middling people, and neither shepherdesses nor queens, we
dread being natural for fear of being thought poor.
For people are very much more afraid of being thought poor than of
being poor, seeing how often they let themselves be dragged into
poverty by idleness and extravagance. The best remedy I know for the
fancied difficulty of opening our door to our visitors, is to have no
friends but those whom we are glad to see, and to begin every new
acquaintance by putting it at once on a footing of actual fact, letting
people understand that we try to make the best of our means, and live
within them. Then, if they will not take us upon our own terms, we need
not regret that they do not wish for our friendship.
We shall find, in actual practice, that it makes very little difference
to their opinion of us, if when we are at home we have the courage to
tell them so ourselves; or if a dirty maid-servant, after an interval
of waiting, receives their cards in the corner of her apron because her
hands are black, and says she will go and see if "missis" is at home,
or even if a neat parlour-maid fulfils the same office, and ushers
visitors into a brown holland-encased room, leaving them to remark the
time the lady of the house takes arranging her dress and her smiles
previous to appearing.
In whatsoever way the ceremonial may be performed is of importance to
none but ourselves. The visitor forgets it immediately, only retaining
a general impression, cheery or dismal, as the case may seem; and if we
are nice people and our visitors nice people, according to our
respective ideas on that subject, we shall cultivate each other's
acquaintance all the same.
It is immensely hard work to make five hundred a year look like a
thousand. The effort to do so is seen through in an instant by a
keen-sighted observer, and then it is ten chances to one if you get
credit for what you really possess. It is never worth while to pinch
and pare our everyday life for the sake of a few occasions of display.
Let us now go on to consider the best fittings and furniture for the
entrance-hall.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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